..Pulse..

im smiling :)

2010-11-13T03:34:00.003+08:00

there you go..ive said it !!!
it was an outburst in a way
lalalalala~

:D

nak masok ni sgt2!!!!!!

2010-10-24T17:35:00.002+08:00

tabung wang simpanan khas.

2010-10-22T00:48:00.002+08:00

really in need of one right now.

i hve a special reason for wanting it so much *wink2*..nk kumpul sehari rm1..kalu baik hati n xkedekut, nk letak lebih sket..tahun dpn baru kasi pecah.

kalu kite nk sumting, yg mahal, yg kite dah bajet bile kite nk beli (contoh lagi 8 bulan), tp duit tarak, sila2 la menabung. bukan susah pon nk menabung ni, just msukkan la la singget shari, kalu ade duit lebih, masukan la 2 hengget ke, 5 hengget ke, kalu byk sgt lebeih, letakla 10 hengget ke kan..nnt dlm mase 8 bulan tu, sedar2 duit tu dah melambak2 dah..kalu shari rm1, 8 bulan dah rm240. kalu shari rm2, 8 bulan tu dah rm480..haaa xke byk tu? bukan terasa pon kalu letak rm2 tu kan??..mmg la bukan beribu, tp dlm xsedar, byk gak leh dpt. cube kalu xsimpan dlm tabung tu, cube ingt blk, agak2 mane pegi rm480 korang tu??hurmmmm...?

tp xnk la beli tabung yg transparent cani..xpasal2 nnt tgk duit tu dah byk, sure tgn ni tergedik2 nk knon2 TERsiku la, TERlanggar la, TERjentik la, smpi la tabung tu TERpecah kan?...haaa mmg xboleh.

pastu xleh la tabung yg ade kunci n leh bukak sesuki-suki jiwa. mmg x sah la kalu xcek nnt hari2..ade je konon2 nk beli brg, nnt knon xckup duit nk pinjam duit kat tabung. ..pastu xsmpat nk smpi suku, dah kontang blk.

jadi, tabung yg mnjadi pilihan jiwa raga mestilah memenuhi kriteria berikut :
1) objek legap. supaya mata xmenggatal.
2) xde exit point tuk duit tu kluar ngan sendirinya
3) msti cantik supaya diri ini terpanggil2 tuk menabung stiap hari.
4) lagi best kalu tabung tu ade alarm kan? so dat tiap2 hari alarm tu leh ingtkan aku tuk masukkan duit..hmm coolnye kalu ade!
5) ade huruf "G" kat badan tabung tu, supaya ada motivasi tuk isi duit tu..sbb bende yg aku nk beli ngan duit2 yg dikumpul dlm tabung ni, stat ngan hruf "G"..hehe..

plan cm biase, bagai nk rak..tp asek lupeeeeee je nk beli..dari hari ke hari nk beli. tp xbeli2 agy.
ok set, sbelom g trendak kene beli satu!!!

ni cool!! mmg memenuhi semua criteria2 yg diingini!!

satu tabung bape harga die haaa?

melankoli rinduku

2010-10-10T13:34:00.003+08:00

haritu (2 thun lepas) aku "dipaksa" tuk tulis n perform sajak tuk maulidur rasul kat kolej.
cair otak nk wat ayat, ketaq lutut nk sampaikan..

harini, kemas2 bilik, terjumpe blk sjak tu! yeay..

ni dia....aku tulis sejujur jujurnya rasa hati..

melankoli rinduku
by: akusyazz (feat baem)

mari pinjamkan matamu singgahkan telingamu..
mari mendengar dari aku yang serba tak tahu..

aku tak boleh bohong. aku xkuat iman...
mungkin aku tak dapat coretkan sebuah taman sebagai lukisan

aku xboleh tipu. aku tak serapat dengannya seperti mana kamu dan kamu
namun aku tak pernah lepas dari menadah tanganku menghala kesitu
supaya walau seketika cuma, dapat kurasakan apekah itu namanya restu

Oh Muhammad Ya Rasulullah.......

Engkau matahari, Engkau purnama, Engkau cahaya diatas cahaya
Sinar kelibatmu tidak pernah menjejak ke inderaku yg sememangnya, fana
sesungguhnya tidak pernah walau sekilas raut parasmu aku tatap
tetapi..
kasihmu, perngorbananmu, sunnahmu, setia menemani kalbuku seperti tujuhnya garisan pelangi yg pekat likat..
masakan rindu ini akan terubat selagi mata tidak terikat..

kau lah pilihan atas pilihan, yang terulung lagi dijunjung,
kau pemimpin akhir zaman, dari awal hingga ke hujung..

puisi ini bukan merintih kasih,
puisi ini bukan menagih rindu,
kasih akan bertaut,
rindu akan terubat,
pasti.
itu janji umat Muhammad,
untuk bertemu
bukan dalam mimpi bukan fantasi,
tetapi disana nanti.....
ini janji.

this is the last of many ive written..
wooo lamenye dah xtulis!

pasti nk start kumpul rasa,
jadikan bibit untuk ditinta.

delusional?

2010-10-07T00:41:00.005+08:00

am i delusional? yes sometimesss..hahaha..
but this song is really cute kan?

oh best gak kalu ade org HOTTTness yg stalk i cmtu...hahaha..see told u, im delusional.

sometimes, being all delusional can give u a little comfort, isnt it?..imagining how blissfull and happy your life is, when the real world wasnt treating you so nicely at all.

i have soooo many stories in my head, that i keep on playing and changing according to my mood. the scary part is, at times i forgot that it was just my imagination. wanting something so bad can be a real danger when your mind is "creative", dont u think?

when people do bad things or say really bad things about me, i dont shout straight into thier face. thats rude..instead, what i do is, when i go back home, i'll lay on my bed, and i'll recreate the scene..and then i'll say/shout/scream or do wahteva possible/impossible thing to them. if im not satisfied with the drama im creating in my head, i just rewind it all back, and re-create..until i feel that my anger has subside......dont you think that this is a better way to manage ur anger?well, it works, atleast for me.. that is why, it is veryyy verryyyy seldom (if ever!) that u see me getting angry at you..kan?

see, my delusions/illusion arent so bad at all. it has saved a lot of people from my intolarable shouting, fugly angry face and unimaginable abusing (u should see me in imagination. it wasnt a preety sight at all.haha)

so, take a moment and think.

:)

hey..DYKTIMUSFB?

2010-10-06T21:48:00.005+08:00

DYKTIMUSFB?
B.U.D.E.C!
but for the sake of time and space, am gonna let this one slip tru..
making my way with a smile and stop being paranoid (haha)
hope to see u at the other end..
see ya !
heehuu~

p/s: im diagnosed with a severe case of paranoia (if u dont already know)..hahaha.

paranoid much? hahaha

bawak g jenjalan pliz..plizzz...?

2010-10-04T18:11:00.002+08:00

please...?
can u just take me away?
anywhere...oh puhleezzz..
nk jenjalan!

chapter 3

2010-10-04T00:59:00.010+08:00

that chapter 3,
suprisingly, was quite long,
not as short as i expected it to be, in the begining..
but by the look of it, i tot its gonna write it self up for a few more pages..
unfortunately i cant be greedy, can i?

well,
it ended.
it ended nicely i would say.
not a happy ending. not a sad one.
just nice.

chapter 2 on the other hand, is still in writting progress..
its very thick.. hopefully it'll get thicker.
and i really hope, that i wont find the end of it.

babi btul la~

2010-09-30T17:06:00.002+08:00

hahaha..this is fun..Douglas Lim has done it again..
super creative la parody ni kan..hahahahah..

traffic light

2010-09-25T00:10:00.003+08:00

traffic light ade bape kaler?
tiga...
tp bile saya yg drive
sy paling suke bila die tukar jadi kaler merah..
mmg yummy lah!
sbb mase ni la kalu nk blasah org kat sbelah, adalah saat plg berkesan.
btul x?
mmg leh smpai tahap tampar kepala, part frontal bone tu laju2..
mmg yummyyyyy laaa
time ni la leh tarik rambut org tu smpi tercabut agak beberapa ~~helai~~ genggam
tumbuk perut org tu dgn kelajuan cahaya
oh and pling effective skali is pencubitan!
hamekkk..kalu xtukar bintik2 or belang2 tgn, kaki dan perut tu mmg xsah.

hipothesis:
semkin byk traffic light spanjang jln tu yg tukar jadi kaler merah,
semakin sukelah saya.

tu la..
brani ko ckp tgn aku lembik macam GAMAT!!!
sendiri yg cari nahas la kan.

sekian.
kepada lampu2 traffic, sila lah bertukar merah.

selamat hari raya!!

2010-09-08T00:37:00.003+08:00

well u've guessed it right..mmg nk ucap slamat hari raya la ni..
so here goes..

saya, Noor Syazwani Bt Redzwan dgn setulus mulus hati ingin mngucapkan,

SELAMAT HARI RAYA
MAAF ZAHIR.

errr...

BATIN perlu ke??

kalu rase perlu, just include it in ok?..haha

mintak maap le bebanyak ye, kalu ade wat slah silap, sbb i mmg tau mulut ni mmg...err...tau2 la kan..hahaha

sayang sume org! yeay!

and tuk sape2 yg ade TERwat slah kat i, i maapkan gak..EXCEPT anonymous..
ok la fine la..maapkan anonymous gak la..haha.

jemput2 la dtg ghumah iye..

again, syg sume...yeay!!

and (ehem) i got to wear a new set of bling2 for raya..yeay again!..THANKSS..heeeee~ :D

SELAMAT HARI RAYA
MAAF ZAHIR..(dan batin hehe)

wohhooooo xsabarnyeeee nk konvoi g serang umah sume org!
jom serang umah prof!!

hackering MONKEY

2010-09-05T11:43:00.003+08:00

ergh!
aku tau aku mmg xleh caye ko kalu ko gune laptop aku..
kejappppppp je aku bg ko gune dah jahanam account2 aku ko hack..
XGUNA KO MONYET!

kepada sape2 la yg bace entry sbelom ni, tolong la..itu adalah satu penipuan!
account ini telah di hack malam smalam semasa group discussion dijalankan..
org sruh wat keje, lain keje die.

bukan stakat blog die hack...FB pon..mmg durjana ko mangkok..
btw,
xde logiknya aku nk pakai bju tuuuuu tuk raya ngok!

p.s: nk perang ye?...baik!..harini aku akan mutatekan ko jadi cheetah...tompok2 la bdan ko japgy...

p.s.s : jaga la laptop ko yg cacat tu..jaga leklok

p.s.s.s : HATI-HATI!!

HAHAHAHA!!

2010-09-04T21:47:00.000+08:00

mixedupemotions

2010-09-03T02:04:00.002+08:00

is it real?
bcoz it seems un-real

im afraid

im happy

im terrified

im content

last longer than foreva

penderaan

2010-08-26T22:38:00.005+08:00

aku mmg cukup xpaham bila org ckp aku ni suke cubit, pukul dan blasah org. ckup x paham. bilanya aku blasah org ni? cubit??? hishhhh!!! lagi la xpernah!... ~~aku~~ saya ni pny la lemah lebut bagai sutera ditiup sang bayu..ckp saya dera org lak.mmg xptut tau awak-awak sume.

oh korang nmpk aku pny penderaan je la kan? stakat tolak gune cari kelingking, ckp aku dera..aku yg kene dera, kene cubit, kene blasah sbenarnye..korang mane tau..sedeyh ah cani.xmo kwn ah korang.ouh...

tgk!! sakit ok..haa..isk isk

korang asek ckp aku blasah die..tp ni die wat cani kat aku..ape cer bai?..aku lah sbenarnye mangsa tau.. isk isk...tgk aku tgkp gmbr bg bukti. walaupon gmbr ni dah 2 taun lepas, tp ia tetap bukti. aku lah mangsa. selama ni korang nmpk aku blasah or cubit or sepak or tumbuk org kuat2, tu cume pertahanan diri ok. survival skills msti mau ade maa...

ok skang ckp, sape yg suke blasah org??..bukan aku.

sape baik???
"SYAZZ!!"

ye tau, trima kasih.

Banyak cinta yang datang mendekat, ku menolak

2010-08-12T21:56:00.006+08:00

these few days, ive been hearing a lot of good songs. but i like to post this one up. i like the lyrics..

it tells you how faithful one can be.

but tooooo faithful? its stupid. like i am. stupid.

but,somehow i like being as stupid as i am..

Banyak cinta yang datang mendekat
Ku menolak
kerna.....

oh the title of this song is, 'kerna ku cinta kau' by bunga cinta lestari

kecanggehan

2010-08-11T21:58:00.007+08:00

percaya tak, kalu aku ckp, canggeh tu, mmg la sgt canggeh..
korang kene caya, sbb die mmg canggeh.

sape pernah ada ketuat? bukan kematu tau..ke.tu.at....pernah?

korang mmg pengotor.

hahahah NOT!!bukan pengotor ek..sape ckp org ade ketuat tu pengotor, mmg kuang aja.sbb aku pon ~~ade~~ pernah ade ketuat gak.haha..

cani ceta die..

ade la satu hari yg tgh aman damai..time2 tgh potong kuku kaki yg belah kanan part jari manis, tibe aku tgk...ni ape yg merah2 lak ni?..Ya Allah...DARAH!! aku ketip skali daging ke??byk gile darah..sampai nitik2 kat lantai..over kan..tp nape xsakit lgsg??xrase pape pon..so aku cube la rase jari tu, kot2 la tgh kebas ke sbb tgh duduk dgn gaya pelik (ok bygkan org yg tgh nk ptotng jari kuku, dlm posisi dimana jari tu lagi 2cm nk masuk mata) lame sgt..pegang pny pegang, xde pon kebas.

pk lagi.

nape x sakit lgsg ni?dah mati ke nerve kat kaki ni..ok gile scary. dah mule la pk, mbe sbb asek pakai heels hari2, so nerve dah cacat.

belek lagi jari manis kaki sbelah kanan ni yg tgh melimpah2 darah

skali... "ehhh??ape ni??ape bintik kecik yg agak hitam ni??pelik gile rupe ko..mcm cauliflower..tp eh jap..mcm pernah ku kenali rupe bentuk ko ni...mcm aku pernah ade je dulu..Ya Allah...Ketuat!!"

EEEEWWWW!!

ok dulu mase kecik2...dlm agak2 darjah 6 kot..pernah kene skali, kat ibu jari kaki belah kanan. mmg meng'eeewwww'kan..tp aku xyah wat pape, die hilang sndiri dlm 2mggu cmtu..so, this time around, aku pon decided nk biar je gak ah..nnt2 hilang ah tu..
'konon!'...xhilang2 pon!!..bengang ok..tiap2 ~~mggu~~ 2-3 hari sure aku akan potong die smpai darah2, dgn harapan die akan mengecil lalu lesap dari pndangan. tp ternyata ianya jauh tersangkal..MAKIN BESAR LA WEYH KO KETUAT!!...tp xpe.ego mesti tebal.potong je lagi!yeahhhh potong!! darahhhh!!

pastu..ni dah smpi 2bulan dah ni, dah agak malu kerana cm dah gedabak je aku tgk ketuat tu..mintak la kat akak aku ubat..kot2 la die ade ubat ketuat..die kate "ade, amek la atas meja tu, ade krim anti-fungal"..aku pon try la pakai..smbil2 tu potong gak lagi..

ibu dah kate jgn potong..nnt die makin besar..tp xpe.degil.and ego mesti tebal.POTONG!!

ok dah jadi MAKIN besar. -_-"

ni xleh jadi.oleh itu...hati dikentalkan.. lalu keluarla ayat ni kepada seorang rakan seperjuangan "eh ko tau x ape ubat tuk ketuat?ko nk tgk ketuat aku x?"..aku pon tunjuk la..."WOI!!BESARNYE!!EEEEEEEE YEK!" ...mmg kuang aja. tp nseb baik die ade ckp yg sruh aku beli ubat ketuat jenis titik kat farmasi, die kate ubat tu canggeh..so aku terus la g cari ubat yg konon canggeh tu.....cari2...dapat.

MMG CANGGEH WOOOO

baru pakai dlm 5 hari..stitik sehari. die tanggallllllllll.....yeeayyyyyyy!!!
selamba badak je aku kupas die tadi...ye, tadi. baruuuu je jap td. ye, 2min sbelom wat post ni. status skang, amat gembiraaa!!!! cauliflower yg besar tp tidak boleh sama skali dikunyah itu, sudah xde.lenyap dari muke bumi.bagus.

nk tau ape ketuat tu sbenarnye? ni haaa...mr.wiki kate :
A wart (also known as a verruca when occurring on the sole of the foot or on toes) is generally a small, rough tumor, typically on hands and feet but often other locations, that can resemble a cauliflower or a solid blister. Warts are common, and are caused by a viral infection, specifically by the human papillomavirus (HPV)[1] and are contagious by contact with the skin of an infected person. It is also possible to get warts from using handtowels or other objects used by an infected person. (durjana mana la yg infect aku ni.baik ngaku!) They typically disappear after a few months but can last for years and can recur.

wart ni ade mcm2 jenis.. aku kene plantar wart ok..bukan genital wart..

PERHATIAN! ni bukan aku pny.

virus ye.
ptut la sbulan aku pakai ubat krim yg amek-la-atas-meja-ade-krim-anti-fungal tu xjalannnnnnn~..haih...kakak la kakak. siap ko balik ni.

haaa ni die. ubat tercanggeh buat mase ni.

mmg canggeh

beli la kat mane2 farmasi, 15ml aku beli RM16 je.
oh! die leh ubatkan kematu and corns gak.

so sape2 yg ade ketuat (or kematu or corns) tu, sila kan la ye. jgn potong, nnt die jadi BESARR.

sekian.

yg pernah ade ketuat,
akusyazz

The Adventure of Broga Hill and the Six Hot Hikers...

2010-08-10T00:10:00.013+08:00

poster The Adventure of Broga Hill and the Six Hot Hikers

wah cam tajuk movie kan?..kalu ceta ni kuar wyg, sure wafaa n abel g tgk..i rase, korang tgk SEMUA movie yg kuar wyg kan? korang gile ape, ingt wyg tu tv ke?..bapak byk gile blanje duit tgk wyg..ish ish ish...haha..

untuk kesekian kalinya..xtau la nape org asek ckp aku xajak dorang g Broga hill ni? Rasenye dah lame announce kat fb dah..dah siap pass mulut ke mulut dah..cane gamaknye aku nk ajak sorang demi sorang..penat ah weyh kalu msing2 nk majuk..hari ni dah bape kali dh dgr "ah, g Broga xajak, cani ah member"......dulu org ajak dgn lemah lembut g jwb "oh.ape je ade kat situ?cm bosan je.tgk la dulu"....haaa kan dah geram.hahaha ...................................................................................................................................................
disebut al-kisah pada tanggal 7hb Ogos 2010, enam bersahabat, 4 jejaka sederhana rupa paras dan 2 org wanita tahap dewi2 gitu, berusaha membangunkan diri pada jam 4am...diulangi..4am tuh!...mempersiapkan diri mengambil masa 30 menit..stelah memaasukan segala yg perlu kedalam bag pack, bertolaklah jejaka2 dan dewi2 itu pergi menuju ke.............BROGA HILL!..

ok penat tulis ayat camni

cani la ..senang ceta..kitorang bgun cpt gile pagi2 buta gelap nk mati gelita tu, sbb kononnye nnt nk naik cpt la atas bukit tu sbb nk tgk SUN RISE..ape die murid2? suuunnnnn risseeeee....ye pandai.tringt jap yg slah sorang dari jejaka yg sederhana rupa paras tu pernah la ckp "weyh korang nk g Broga tu nk wat pe? aku dah cek dah kat tenet, xde pape pon atas tu, ade rumput je"...underestimate btol mamat ni..ditambah pulak dorang pnah tgk fb sai g naik broga siap tangkap gmbr pakai dress putih alun2 ngerbang2 gitu...lagiiiiii laaaaaa ter underestimate yg melampau jejaka2 ini..

salah sorang dari wanita berparas ala2 dewi ni dah ckp "korang, esok pakai sport shoe ok..".....tp, biasa la..guys being guys...degil. bapak gile degil.sorang je dgr ckp. sorang je dari EMPAT jejaka yg sederhana rupa paras tu yg pakai sport shoe. yg lagi TIGA..pakai SELIPAR...mak datok....nk ditambahkan ceta kedegilan, dorang siap pakai suar jeans agy tu...bapak ah underestimate gile kan..bergaya sakan nk g hiking.ooohhhh memang melampau..

yg pakai slipar reebok tu plg melampau. ingt nk g pasar?

lepas tu...nk dijadikan cerita la kan..dah pergi kul 430am..patutnya dah bajet la kot tmpat tu gelap kan...?

eh x..

kitorang xtau pon tempat tu gelap.kitorang xtau pon yg kitorang nk daki tu hutan. kitorang xtau pon die tinggi gile nk mati smpai lenguh kaki gigil2.kitorang xtau pon ramai nk mati org g hike gak mase tu. and.............kitorang xtau la pulakkkk nk hujan gile lebatttttttttttttttt mase tu!!...mak aih..dah la gelap gulita, gigi org pon xnmpk, xbwk lak torch light kan..pndai, mmg pandai..org underestimate, cmtu la jadinya...seb baik ade acik cine penjual petai duk kat kaki bukit tu jual torch light "aaaaa...mau bili ini ka?ini lu kasi angkat, sipuloh linggit aja..kasi angkat"...
pastu..nk dijadikan cerita lagi..tujuan utama dtg ke Broga adalah untukk menonton sun rise. tp baru daki 2-3 tapak dah "eh cm hujan la"...."bukan kot, ni embun jatuh dari pokok kot"....hmmm yela tu...xsmpi bape minit lencun sume kuyup...gile lebat!..balut la kepala gune plastik..pastu nk naik bukit tu..ish tolong la..bukan takat cm nk g jenjalan raya umah pkcik mail kat sbelah umah..ni angle die pny kecerunan mau cecah 80 degree...dgn hujan lebat, dlm hutan, lecak, licin, ade gaung...pakai pulak slipar??haaa..mmg..mmg jalannn. hahaha..

smbil kitorang daki dah dekat 30min, kaki gigil, smbil berpeluh2 dlm hujan tu, lalu kat tepi satu kumpulan len..terdgr leader die ckp "wokeyh, lagi 10min kite smpi puncak 1!!"........lagi SE.PU.LUH. minit???Puncak SA.TU?? ade bape puncak niiiii???ohhooooo nyesalllllllll...
tp xpe, ego mesti tebal. NAIK!! dah penat2 bgun kul 4am nk patah balik??! meh aku patahkan dulu pale org yg nk blk tu..

.................................................................

akhirnya..slepas tergelincir barang beberapa kali dan menjerit "oi tunggu la jap, aku xnmpk jln ni!", kami pun smpi ke puncak....puncak satu..
mane sun rise? hujan laaa weyhhhhh...mane dtg chaya langit tu....dah la sejuk nk mampos, cm nk luka kulit kene angin laju die..oh tidak.oh tidak. oh tidak!!

nk dipendekkan cerita, sependek aku, selepas beberapa ratus keping gambar ditangkap, dan beberapa juta kali gelak golek2, kami pon naik la smpi ke puncak..puncak betul ni..puncak 4..pada pukul lebih kurang 9 kot..haaaaaa....exhilarating ok! :D

pjg sgt nk tulis kalu nk ceta satu2 ape yg jadi...

tp konklusi ceta ni..kalu nk naik broga hill tu, jgn la under estimate die..mmg korang nmpk org tgkp gmbr cntik2 je, byk rumput indah2 sama lalang2 pjg...tp tolong la..nk smpai ke situ, mmg kene hike la wey...bukan leh jln lengang lenggok..
jadi..kalu nk pegi, sila jgn lupe:

pakai proper attire. sports attire. bukan slipar n suar jean ek.
jgn underestimate... bukit tuuu bai...bukan busut.
bwk torchlight, kalu boleh sorang satu (kalu pegi pagi buta la)...tp g pagi buta la yg best!
pegi pagi2 buta kalu xnk kene panas
bwk insect repellant
bwk sweater kalu takut sejuk
bwk plastik ke baju hujan ke ape ke, in case hujan
bwk breakfast.picnic la kat atas tu cm kitorang..best woo..haha
oh! bwk camera ofcoz!
bwk plaster..kalu ade yg nk tunjuk macho, pastu tergesel kat batu. ZASSS!
oh siap2 la g berak ke pape dulu sbelom naik tu yeeee
bwk diri

of BrogaHill and mancing udang

2010-08-08T18:04:00.003+08:00

it was hell FUN!..mbe it wasnt as fun for other people, but it was surely damn is for us. we had a blast.. will write up on it, when i get the SD card from anis.

anis cpt laaa..nk SD!!

no.this is NOT a lovey dovey post.

2010-08-04T19:40:00.003+08:00

no. its not for a lovey dovey matter.you know when u hear certain song, you can literally feel your heart melting and feel those adrenaline pumping, and and and it make u feel something..different..i dont know, i dont know how to describe it. reminiscent maybe, of your subconscious mind. its the same feeling when i hear, 'tak bisakah' by peter porn.
do you know what this feeling im talking about. no. not a lovey dovey one.

this song, 'parachute' by Cheryl Cole, does not give me the same effect as what the peter porn song has on me, but..
i simply love this song. the ryhtm somehow remind me of something. as if it brought me to... somewhere..

but i think, its always the other way around.the lyric, i mean.

love it.

pengkaji.

2010-08-04T02:38:00.003+08:00

aku spatutnya tidur.

eh.tak tak.

aku spatutnya study.
kan esok nk amek test untuk jadi researcher. kalu lulus, dpt sijil. kalu dpt sijil kira certified researchers la..

kan?

research. kajian.
untuk menjawab persoalan2 yg terlekat kejap dlm otak. jadi sila selesaikan, kata mereka. nnt kami kasi duit, kata mereka lagi.
jadi siapa2 yg byk persoalan canggeh2 yg slama ni korang pikir mase tgh termenung smbil menyahtinja tu. sila jwb soalan2 anda itu, dgn melakukan reseach.nnt dpt ilmu. ilmu yg dpt tu, leh bantu seantero manusia. tak ke bagus tu?. . dah la dpt tambah ilmu, dpt duit jugak.

seronok kan? menyelam smbil minum air.kembong perut.

mmg..mmg byk sgt soalan2 dlm benak aku ni yg aku nk persoalkan. mcm...

kenape aku yg kene cuci tandas?bukan abg?..
kenape tinggi aku 147cm je?abg aku 180cm?
kenapa warna mata aku xleh tukar2 ikut suka aku?
kenapa kim xpernah lipat slimut?
masih boleh ke quacker oats tu serap cholesterol, kalu aku dah kembangkan die dlm air milo pekat berkrim?
kenape pintu bilik air ni bukan kaler pink?
bila aku nk kurus?...jap.. rephrase..bila aku akan jadi kurus?..eh jap. rephrase..bila aku nk start excercise?
mane perginya ketip kuku mhal aku?
kenape petai sedap, tp buat kencing jadi busuk?..
kenape petai kaler hijau?die nk kene gune fotosinthesis gak ke?bukan die ade kulit ke?
nape org ckp aku pucat walaupon dah pakai blusher n lipstick menyala2?
diorang xtau ke bila diorang pggil aku 'manusia berkaki empat'..aku akan gelak skali sama diorang. tp sebenarnye aku mati berkali-kali.lagi dan lagi dan lagi.....dan lagi...lagi...
siape yg cipta sume perkataan dlm bahasa melayu ni?..
kenape, kenape is kenape? paham x?...kenapa, kenapa ialah kenapa?..kenapa bukan hipupo?...mesti xpaham kan?xpe la..
kenapa bila byk kali sgt sebut kenapa, perkataan tu cm dah xbetul?cm pelik..ke.na.pa......ape tu?
bila aku nk smbung stdy ni?

tp semua soalan ni, xboleh dijadikan problem statement tuk wat research.
kan best kalu boleh.kaya aku.haih..

tlg la..aku nk sijil tu.SGT nak.SGT.

aku nk jwb satu soalan kat atas tu.
jwapan dia: sekarang.

dgn terjawabnya soalan itu. harusla saya berhenti menaip disini. tata.

to be or not to be?

2010-07-29T00:12:00.003+08:00

yes it is true..
there is a fine line between two things..

there's is a fine line between hot and cold..
between hate and love
between bestfriends and lovers
between genius and madness
between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot..
between confidence and cockiness
between work and slavery

and for the matter that im in now is...there is a finee line between HAVING a fever and NOT having it anymore..there is an eerie gray area, where my body is confusing it self. some parts of my brain are practically saying "yes!!syaz ko dah sembuh.leh g men kejar2"...and at the same time, there are some that are saying "u dont have enough sleep.sleep some more.u have not urinated enough today,only 99times today, up, go and pee some more..who says that u are all better syaz?im the one who is controlling u...now u will feel very cold! no no no..wait..i want u to feel hot! steamy hot..yes hot.....hurmm..no not hot..cold is better..yup cold! shiver now u little bastard!shiver!shiver!hahahah!!...wait..how would you like to experience the feeling of flying?..now, you will feel your legs wobble, the world around you spin like crazy!!yes i like it!!yes like that!! ok now, be like this for the rest of the day...fly all day long for free!yeayyyy"...

rase cm nk bunuh org tau x..rase cm nk bunuh doctor yg kasi MC shari je tu..
duduk rase nk terbang, baring rase melayang...
rase sejuk, tp bile pakai slimut peluh cm laha**t, bile bukak slimut gigil cm gile..
mkn antibiotic merah tu, sure sesak nafas,
perut rase pusing2 bykkkkk gile kentut,
stomach upset,
cirit birit,
nausea,
lightheadedness,
hingus ngalir cm empangan pecah,
eyeball panas n sakit
xpaham, nape air mata pon nk kuar gak , bukan air mata ngis lak tu,pelik
tekak cm kene gigit ngan 1000 semut api
kencing agaknye ade dlm 467kali shari

tp suhu kat dahi, xpanas..

now you tell me..

am i having a fever or am i Not?

arghhhhh...badan please stop confusing yourself.please...

laaitu dipa rataan sakma

2010-07-28T01:50:00.005+08:00

td..aku ckp sama aqila, aku sudah mau tidur..esok ade presentation. (qila, btul weyh aku xtipu)..

tp, aku ter'pause membaca blog kau..
kau weyh..budak yg slalu wat aku gelak..
budak yg slalu aku tny "ko suke hati x?"..and ko wat muke konfius "huh?aku tgh mkn kot, pesal ko tny pasal aku happy ke x lak ni??"..haih..aku ckp pasal hati ayam la mangkuk..haha..
ko la budak yg plg ikot arahan "pggil die "syaz comel" kalu x, bayar aku 50sen!"...hari2 ko pggil aku syaz comel.hah..aku tau aku comel. wekk..hahaha
ko la budak yg sukeeeeee gelakkan sorang kwn kita yg gagap tu..hahaha..bile kite bergabung nk bahan die, mmg smpai jatuh kerusi. dah jatuh benti jap.gelak lagi.
ko la budak yg tinggal.alahai...dekat gile ngan umah aku...tp baru skali je ko dtg..aku lak xpernah g umah ko..(sorry weyh)
ko la budak yg suke cikgu Rushidi pny teka teki..sape x kan?..hahaha aku pon!
ko la budak yg dgn aku kite terbalikkan perkataan2 yg ade...dan kite wat lagu ni..

laaitu dipa rataan sakma..
soke nganja yula-anyula..
taiin mika rataan paknam..
soke nganja durin-andurin..

skang aku dah xleh pnggil ko "budak yg"....ko skarang adalah wanita.
wanita yg sudah lama sgt aku tinggalkan..
sehingga aku xtau, yg ko boleh menulis luahan yg sgt indah..
dan..
sehingga aku xtau ade kisah sedih disebalik tawa riang kau itu..
dan sebalik semua itu, adanya seorang wanita yg tabah.
maafkan aku ye kwn..

aisyah aku rindu ko..
rindu raqim gak.
rindu khai gak.
rindu nk gelak smpai jatuh krusi sbb nk tunggu raqim legkapkan ayat.

(eh ok, kang penat aku nk tulis aku rindu sume org...jgn kecik aty la ye..dah kul 2am ni..otak xcenter nk ingt name sume org)

ahhhhh rindu semua la!!

aisyah...jgn hilangkan senyuman ko yg manis tu ye..nnt kalu kite jmpe lagi, aku nk tgk ko masih mampu ukir senyum tuk aku :)

no update.

2010-07-27T23:54:00.002+08:00

bukan xnk update....nak sgt

bukan xde idea....hish byk gileeeee

bukan xde mase....hahaha ok ni gelak, sbb mmg belambak2 lambak lambak dan lambak

bukan xde tenet connection.....ade, laju lak tu

.
.
.
.
.

habis tu...kenape dajahnye x update2??

SBB MALAS GILEEEEE WEYHHHHH....

nnt2 la bila rajin aku jadikan kau teman luahan sejati aku ye missy bloggy...ye rindu kamu juga!!..tp ...nnt la..MALASSS!!!hehe..

fuhyo :D

2010-07-18T22:23:00.002+08:00

ok agak canggeh ek blogspot ni skang. sudah boleh tukar layouttt..yeay. (ok fine, tau cm ketinggalan gile kan)..tp lantak la...nk yeay gak. YEAYYYYY!!...sudah tukar..kalu yg dulu2, kalu nk tukar layout, abes la hilang sume bende yg aku wat, badge2, lagu2 la sume menatang tu hilang nnt..tp kali ini, adalah sgt berjaya dan mengagumkan..xhilang pape pon..siap leh tentukan width layout ni..pastu leh pilih dari pelbagai2 jenis dan ragam corak tuk background..ade bnyakkkk gileee..haha..ok cm org gile tgh excited.malu nk smbung lagi pjg2.

so, sape2 yg rase cm dah bosan tahap gaban ngan layout blog die skang, sile2 la explore design2 baru yg ade tu ek?hehuuuu~

kalu dah siap men tukar2 layout, gtau plz..nk tgk! hehe

demi matahari..

2010-06-26T18:24:00.003+08:00

Demi matahari dan sinarnya di pagi hari
Demi bulan apabila ia mengiringi
Demi siang hari bila menampakkan dirinya
Demi malam apabila ia menutupi
Demi langit beserta seluruh binaannya
Demi bumi serta yang ada di hamparannya
Demi jiwa dan seluruh penyempurnaannya
Allah mengilhamkan sukma kefasikan dan ketaqwaan
Beruntung bagi yang mensucikan-Nya
Merugi bagi yang mengotori-Nya

Tujuh.
Tujuh kali Dia bersumpah.

lagi..lagi dan lagi diri ini terjelopok..aku yg bukan siapa-siapa..yg tidak punya hak atas diri sndiri.. tidak layak untuk mengadili walau sebesar zarah kehidupan itu sekalipun..
seluruh semesta tunduk akur pada yg satu..dari sebesar2 galaksi sehingga sekecil-kecil atom2 yg membinanya..aku..hanya salah satu..hanya. salah. satu dr apa yg tercipta milikNya..jika dikumpulkan setiap segala yg termilik olehNya,segala yg tertulis didalam surah di atas, dan lebihhhhh lagi..aku ini?..nothing.nothing. setiap degup jantung, setiap daya yg menyokong tulang belulang ku ini, setiap hela nafas, setiap warna yg kulihat, setiap bunyi yg terdengarkan, setiap rasa yg tercetus, setiap aliran darah, setiap sel yg hidup, dan seluruh adanya jiwa ini, milik Dia..Hanya Dia..aku ini bukan apa-apa.bukan apa-apa.bukan apa-apa.bukan apa-apa.bukan apa-apa.bukan apa-apa!!bukan apa-apa!!

begitu juga engkau.

jadi..

megapa begitu bongkak?!
mengapa masih berjalan smbil menghentak sepertinya tanah itu lebih rendah darjatnya?!
mengapa masih mengeluh sepertinya panas itu ciptaan mu?!
mengapa masih berebut seakannya udara itu milik kau seorang?!
mengapa perlu menilai setiap salahnya org dihadapan mu, sepertinya engkau begitu yakin yg engkau sesunggunya lebih mulia dari dia walau sebesar zarah pun?!seperti dosanya lebih besar dari dosa mu??
mengapa?
mengapa??
mengapa???

atas dasar apakah kau nilaikan aku.....?
perlukah aku bukukan segala amalan ku dan hamparkan setiap satunya di hadapan matamu?supaya terperoleh untukku pahala darimu?
perlukah aku kepilkan setiap senyumanku untukmu, supaya terperoleh untukku syafaat mu?
ATAS DASAR APA?

haih.

lakum dinukum waliyadin..

Subhanallah..sesungguhnya, aku terlalu byk dosa, bertimbun2 tidak terhitungkan.xterbayangkan.aku tau..aku sedar itu.
tetapi..
apa kurangnya engkau?
tinggi sugguhkah darjatmu..

jika tak kau kenali diri ini,
janganlah terus kau caci..
dgn sebesar2 ruang yg ada dlm jiwa ini, aku pelawa dan menjemput kau untuk menegur salahku..
tetapi jangan kau lupa melihat dimana langkahmu..

penulisan ku ini, bukan untuk menconteng arang atau menunding mana2 jari kearah siapa pun..sesungguhnya kesemua 20 jariku, aku tundingkan pada diriku sndiri. untuk peringtan bagi diri.
Demi Allah yg Maha Pengasih lagi Maha Penyayang..
Sesungguhnya, Dia lah yang Maha Penyantun..

sanggupkah berkongsi kasih?

2010-06-05T10:18:00.004+08:00

langit bagai gugur menhentak dada,
hancur punah segala raga,
robek hati, minda dan jiwa,
saat kau tetapkan matamu untuk... dia..

-akusyazz-

sanggupkah?
aku xtau la nape tetibe nk puitis lak kan..ni sume salah lagu "takdir cinta" yg rossa nyanyikan tuk filem Ayat-ayat cinta tu..

ishh..sanggup ke korang nk berkongsi kasih?
bayangkan, orang yg korang sayangkan sangat tu, yg sentiasa ade pagi petang siang malam dlm hati korang...tiba2 korang nmpk tgh 'ehem2' dgn pmpuan lain.
atau dalam situasi lain. suami. ape agaknya rase bila suami, seorang lelaki pada siapa kau serahkan segala2nya, tiba2 kata nk kawin lain? wuuaaaaa!! nangis jerit weyh..
mungkin ade rase agak nk bunuh laki tu...dan xlupa jugak pmpuan tu...kan?kan?

tapi ape sebenarnya hak kita? dimana letaknye sempadan 'hak' kita tu?...boleh ke kita dgn menabik dada dan mencanangkan "kau milik aku.hanya aku."?...sbb bila aku dgr lirik ni..

"biarlah ku hidup seperti ini
takdir cinta harus begini
ada kau dan dia bukan ku yang mau
oh Tuhan tuntunlah hatiku"

memang benar, mungkin mmg dah ditakdirkan. kalau mmg jodoh perempuan yg 'lagi satu' tu, dah ditakdirkan dgn org yg korang ksihi amat sgt... cane?isshhh...cane ek?
bukan salah lelaki, mereka dijadikan untuk boleh menyayangi lebih dari satu wanita.. TAPI..yg SALAHNYA is bila dorang asik gunakan ayat tu sebagai ALASAN. sunnah nabi katenya.. and yg pmpuan lak akan jawab "ohhhh! sunah nabi yg part tu je awak nk la ikot ye..sunnah2 lain xnk ikot!!!.."....dan bermulalah acara piring terbang...bermula acara anak lari rumah..acara anak kurang perhatian..acara mengadu domba..dan pelabagai2 lagi..KALAU lelaki tu tidak tahu bagaimana cara yg betul untuk menjadi suami yg adil. ish bukan senang kot nk jadi adil..tu kalu kwin dua..kalu kwin tiga??empat?? Masyallah...xleh nk byg tanggungan die..

but seriusly, who is to be blame here?
the ladies, who do not know how to take care of their marriage and husband?
or...the guys yg gatal sgt?

for me personally, ....... aku xsanggup....

Coming SOON!

2010-05-24T19:11:00.004+08:00

sugar

2010-04-28T20:12:00.003+08:00

.when u dont tell me about all those sweet little (or big) things you did for me.
.and when i come to know about it from someone else.
my heart just melts awayyyyyyyyyyyy~~~~
i think i might get diabetes
dear you, thank you.

pisang emas dibawa berlayar, msk sbijik di atas peti...

2010-04-28T01:32:00.008+08:00

akhirnye..masalah rumah, nk pilih2 bilik dah settel..
sampai bengkak2 mate..hamek ko.
malu sgt2 ok...xpernah ngis depan org tau x..buang tebiat agaknye..buruk! buruk!
tp td mmg xleh tahan pny..gigil2 otot2 muka nk than..gagal.

1. thanks to my very understanding housemates faran n ecah..thanks a lot k..hutang budi ni..i'll pay it back one day.

2. thanks to U for giving me the comfort and support i needed. i really2 apreciate it. :) (p/s: tikam dia, jgn xtikam)

bak kate org..buat baik dibalas baik..

aku pulak,
Syukur Alhamdulillah..Allah bukakkan jalan tuk aku kali ni..
mungkin sbb aku tlg cicak yg terstuck 2 hari dlm sink tu kuar td kot..

thx cicak sbb doakan aku. len kali stuck la lagi, leh aku tlg.

kwn makan kwn

2010-04-24T10:26:00.003+08:00

aku xsgka..
never in my life, i tot you would do this to me..

kamu..kamu terkantoi la..
kamu lupe..kamu penah TERRRbagi tau sy bende yg kamu xprasan, adalah sgt penting.
sy rase la kan, kamu smpi skang xprasan, yg kamu dah TERbg info tu.
dan sy ade bukti kukuh yg kamu perangkap sy..
sumpah xsgka.sumpah.

kamu tau sy ni dlm kesusahan yg amat la sgt..
kamu tau sy ni amat la sedang memerlukan barang yg kamu offer tu..
mmg sy la yg bodo, g percaya sgt kat kamu tu kan..
yela,kwn sndiri, sape xcaya kan?
xsgka kene tipu hidup2..

nk tau cane kamu terkantoi?
mlm smalam, dah nk tido ni..dah kul 3am..dah tutup lampu dah pon..dah pejam mata dlm 5min..
tgh pikir2 pasal kesempitan yg aku tgh lalui skang ni..dgn amat la sedeyh..
aku terpikir nape la mata ni xnk tido2 agy..aku dah guling2 pon xnk tido..
tetibe, Allah ilhamkan kat aku..xtau kenapa..xtau untuk ape..tp mcm ade sumting yg bagitau aku "eh syaz. pekata ko cek..btul ke?"
..........
jwapan yg terpampang kat depan mata aku wat jantung ni rase nk jatuh.
...........
aku cek lagi skali....
....btul...
cek lagi..
...still sama...
pagi ni aku cek lagi..sbb aku sgt xcaye laaaa die wat cani kat aku..
..tetap sama...........

kepada kamu..
how could you. i trusted you. now, i will never again.never.
i know im stupid.but never once i tot YOU, of all people would do that to me.
YOU.

and after soooo long i tried not too... i cried.

p/s: again..dont anybody ask me, who am i refering to. please DONT!
bcoz seriously, you wouldn't want to hear the words that might come out from my mouth.

p/s: sai..this is not about you. jgn awak terasa pulak tau. you, i love..

login facebook dpt rm100..halal ke haram?

2010-04-22T13:10:00.006+08:00

it has been awhile since the first time i hear about this scheme.
and i was OFCOURSE very very very sceptical, as im a paranoid.
for me, this scheme is one of the 'get rich scheme'..
i have never believe in it.
sume tipu nih!

but yesterday, my fren, Nana, has ask me to join this scheme..and i was, like i always has been, very sceptical, said to her that "u masuk dulu, if u dpt duit tu btul2, bru i masuk".. and she did. yesterday, she bank-in her rm100 to her upline, and this morning she came to class and.. "syaz! i dah dpt rm700!!".. and i was like "yeke..(still sceptical)..dah msuk bank u ke? (secara sinisnye)"..she said "of belom, i xde la nk gtau u..DAH!"...ape lagi, i straight away "OK I NK MASUK. REGISTERKAN I SKANG!" hahaha..that was me being me. hehe

ok then, i pon start la..msging my frens to invite them to join the scheme..sebab cm gempak kan dpt rm700 dlm sehari.
some seems interested. some says no. but one make made me think.
yes..that one person made me think of the consequences.. and he actually made me feel like a bad person. yeah..
but somehow, thank to him, i waas having some thoughts "hurm..halal ke bende ni?kang aku makan hasil duit ni, pejadi? sanggup ke aku sbb duit skit kat dunia ni, kene soal kat akhirat nnt?" ...hurmm..
then i had some discussion with my classmate regarding this matter..some of them said that it is haram.
feeling very dissapointed, because i REALLY REALLY need some money now, i decided not to join the scheme, and said sorry to Nana that i could do it. i just can't.

but, i still want to get some money somehow. i remembered that my mom, is working in an islamic bank. thus i called her..
she said that "it is not Syariah Compliant. but it is not considered Haram also bacause it has a product to offer.its up to you to use the product or not, but the company has provided you with their products. and that is it. anyway syg, it is really up to you in the end. what is your niat? your niat is to help the one who is your upline, which is nana your friend, and at the same time, you help yourself, right?..i know you are concern about the halal and haram issues, but if you are not satisfied with my answer, you can do your own research. search the net darling, im sure there must be some issues regarding this already.."

so, i did my research..
some said haram, some said halal.
you can read these articles
the one saying its haram: click here
and the one saying that it is halal: click here
after debating with my own conscience i decided that the debate of the the article that says it is halal wins.
read it guys.. read it.. i did my research, and so must you.

in the end,
i registered under nana on the scheme!

to those interested, you can ask me.
its easy money. not free money. but without "usaha" you will not earn anything!!
so keep your mind open.
if you have decided to join, ask me for details!

this is my link:
http://www.infinitydownline.com/?id=akusyazz

si anonymous..

2010-04-19T01:31:00.003+08:00

kadang2 aku xpaham ngan sikap sesetengah org.. aku xkacau sape2 pon..nape kacau hidup aku?
aku nk tulis blog, tempat aku nk luahkan ape yg AKU rase, pon org nk hina2..kenape?

meh tgk ape sorang manusia yg xbrani nk letak name die mase komen kat post aku yg brtajuk "air mata duyung", die gelar diri die 'anonymous'
yg peliknye die ni, bukan nk komen kat post tu..die nk komen pasl air mata duyung tu, tp terbijak sket, die letak komen die kat "trima kasih saiyang" ..
aku xpaham manusia cani la..die kenal ke aku ek? xpela..

tuk mudahkan korang, meh aku paste je komen die kat sini..

"pergh.. sedap kau cakap knowledge org lemah.. dah ko blaja pasal medic.. ko tau la pasal hormon2 ke ape kebenda tu.. cuba suruh ustaz plak tanye ko pasal agama.. kompom bangang ko nak menjawab.. suruh lawyer lak tanye pasal undang2.. terlopong mulut ko cam budak bengong nak menjawab.. tak yah la mengata orang ye.. ko tu pun ilmu tak de tinggi mane.. setakat amek medic kat cucms.. alahai.. dak credit spm pun leh amek.. bio dpat b pun leh amek lagi asal kan ada duet.. so jgn pandang orang sebelah mate ye"

aku nk tny sket.. ade ke aku hina org kat dlm post tu?
sesungguhnya org2 yg xkenal aku, sgt xtau cara n nada aku berckp dan ayat2 yg aku sering gunakan..kesian die..
tp ni aku nk ckp sket kat ko..meh dgr meh..

tp sbelom tu, tuk mudahkan ko, n nk selamatkan ko dari dosa fitnah lagi, ko kene bygkan dulu muke aku bercakap cane ye..bukan muke marah yeee..tp muke mcm makcik jual cendol yg tgh nasihatkan anak die dgn lemah lembutnya..ade faham?..dah ready?..dah bleh byg? ok..ingt..aku mkcik yg lemah lembut tu tau..smbil kelip2 mata perlahan2 lagi tu..haaa..

ok mula...

..sesungguhnya aku kesian la ngan ko ni wahai si anonymous yg xbrani nk letak name oi..len kali kalu nk hina carut aku, sila letak nama. atleast aku leh doakan kehadrat illahi kesihatan ko..tp jap, ade aku sruh ko bace blog aku ke? kesian..kesian..

ko kalu xpaham ape aku tgh ckp, jgn nk pandai2 bygkan nada dan intonasi aku mase tulis bende2 tu ye..aku tulis tu dgn nada yg aku slalu gune ngan KAWAN2 aku (which im sure u r not one of them!)..xde lgsg nada nk merendah2kan org..ko xkenal aku lgsg..yg ko trus nk hambur aku cmtu apehal? yg ko terasa sgt kenapa agaknye ye?haih..kesian aku tgk manusia2 cmni la..kalu xkenal aku, jgn byk bunyik kat sini bleh tak...?hmm??

mmg aku bodo.aku ngaku..aku xpernah ckp aku pandai pon..mcm ko ckp..SPM bio dpt B.matrik kantoi.buat blk foundation (kat CUCMS 'je' pulak tu kan?kan?).mmg..bodo kan??tp aku terus usaha ye..aku xbrenti kat situ dan tunggu mati.aku tau ape cita2 aku..cita2 aku adalh tuk menjadi seorang doktor dan dgn izin Allah, semoga aky dpt bantu mereka2 yg sakit..aku dgn setekun2nya usaha semula. haa..ni bukan nk bermegah..baik aku ckp awal2, sbb kdang2 mnusia cm ko ni suke skah anggap..tapi kan..foundation aku 3.8 ko xnk bising ke syg??PRO exam 1 aku distinction ko xnk carutkan pulak ye?! semua berkat doa mak bapak aku, guru2 aku, ye....guru aku, merangkap prof2 dari 'CUCMS' tu...yg ko ckp kami bodo sgt tu..yg KAU rendahkan tu..sume tu ko xnk carutkan kat komen ko tu ke sayanggggg?

yela..budak2 yg masuk CUCMS sume bangang2 kan?ko tu pasti bijak pndai dari University A-list dan ahli syurga tingkat ke-7 kan?bgus..tahniah aku ucapkan pada ko.

ko nk ckp "asalkan ada duet" ye?..asalkan ade duet..anak org kaya, bodo cm babi kacuk lembu pon leh masuk 'CUCMS" ni kan..tapi ko lupe sesuatu la, or maybe ko xtau, BAPAK.AKU.DRIVER.TEKSI la, whai sial!...aku sgt bangga jadi anak die! dia,seorang ayah yg xkenal erti penat dan sgt kaya dgn kasih syg.. and ko nk ckp pasal duet kat sini?? kalu xreput kaki mak aku panjat tangga bgunan MARA tu, xkering air mata dia, dek nk merayu tuk aku si miskin jijik lagi bodoh ni nk dptkan loan,aku xmsuk tempat ni la whai keparat!haih..sayangnye aku kat ko ni..rase cm nk tikam2.. (ingt,nada aku mcm mkcik yg tgh nasihatkan anak dgn lemah lembut ye)

kau tau x ape yg aku paling benci pasal ko?..kalu stakat fitnah aku sorang je, aku xkesah sgt la lagi.. tapi ko hina SEMUA kwn2 aku yg blajar kat sini. kau perkecilkan guru2 aku. usaha2 dorang. kau perkecilkan university yg dorang usahakan dgn titik peluh dorang, dgn niat baik nk didik anak bangsa..kau berdosa pada mereka. kau carik la dorang semua (guru2 and semua student2 cucms ni) kat akhirat nnt ye..harap2 dpt la ko jmpe dorang nnt..kalu stakat dosa ko fitnah aku bukan2 tu, jgn risau, aku dah maafkan.

haih..anonynous..anonymous..

nk sruh org jgn sedap mulut konon.g cermin diri tu dulu ye. sila jgn singgah tempat ni lagi. g men jauh2. shooohhh!!

oh ye..lupe nk beri peringtan.. kalu satu hari nnt, kau sakit..ko nk g klinik atau hospital mane2, nk jumpe doktor, baik ko tny die lulusan university mane ye..aku takut kalu dorang tau tu ko, nnt dorang kasi racun.

maDe up.

2010-04-10T00:54:00.008+08:00

hehuuu

as promised last few days..
i said im gonna update on the post "i want to be an artist........"
so.. today is the day.
today is Ain's pre-graduation dinner..and i am her 'make-up artist' for the day..so..let us see, what have i done to her face..

jeng jeng jeng! takut x? takut x? haha

before anything.nothing. tp tetap cantik kan?

after foundation and powder

bluish greenish turquioshish eyeshadow.
i use 4 combination of colors to get this effect

notice the shadow along the nasal bridge?
just to define and to add kemancungan of the nose bak kate org la.

eye was lined and mascara-ed ..haha

i draw her eyebrow darker and splash some pink blusher on her cheeks

after the lip has been lined and dashed with colour

side view.
i have put some hair product to add volume and curls

tadaaa...

dont worry, that is definitely NOT her dinner dress. :p

let me remind u of the 'before' photo :) haha

AND oh!

i also did on Ain's friend eye..some gold, yellow, gray and dark navy blue

sorry la if terburuk with the unpolished skill of makeup'ing.
i did not go to any beauty class.so.... go figure la kan..haha
what i have today is solely thru trial and error , with some help from utube!

oh sungguh laaa xjadi mcm yg video from utube that i took tu kan??hahaha!! sorry!

till then..tata~

mari tolong rookie!

2010-04-09T15:37:00.002+08:00

Nokia is looking for 12 dynamic individuals to battle it out for internships at four high-profile companies. Armed with just a Nokia E72, Nokia Messaging and their wits, contestants will take on a series of challenges. Of the final four contestants, the ultimate champion will be crowned The Rookie and win a RM10,000 cash prize. If you think you’ve got what it takes to be The Rookie, seize this opportunity and prove it.

the objective is to drive Malaysian youths to the campaign website to sign up for this awesome opportunity to fast-track their career and win RM10,000 cash!

so lets drive this campaign and support them!

so..MARI MARI MARI! click Oh!SyazSgtBaik :) for further info!

who am i?

2010-04-09T12:49:00.006+08:00

xsuke tau x..
sgt xsuke!
benci..menyampah..rase nk bg penampar laju2 smpi necrosis kulit..
bile aku dgr soklan ni..dan bile ianya di'incooperated dlm ayat2 yg tertentu..
macammmm nk cabarrr aku je kan..
ayat2 yg dimaksudkan adalah seperti berikut

"hek elehh.... ko sape?!"
"suke aty aku la..nk halang aku pehal?ko sape?!"
"yg ko nk marah2 aku ni nape?ko sape?!"
"apehal lak aku kene wat cmtu?ko sape?!"
"pehal aku nk dgr ckp ko?ko sape?!"
"yg ko nk jeles2 ni pehal?ko sape?!!!"
"sibok pehal?ko sape?!"
"ko sape?!"
"ko sape?!"
"ko sape?!"

arghhhhhhh! xsuke pahammmm x..
kene ke tny cmtu...
aku tau laa aku sape..
i know very well where i stand..
i know who i am..

"im no one"

i wanna be an artist..oopps..makeup artist i mean

2010-04-06T03:02:00.006+08:00

knowing that i have a deep interest in makeup, ain has asked me to put some make up for her this friday, for her pharmacy Pre-grad dinner..
i have been doing this for her , several times now..haha.. "cas,i nk g dinner mggu dpn..*ihik*..leh x u..err *ihik2* mekup2kan i ciket *wink2*"..
she told me that shes goin to wear a turquoise colored dress.. so..as a 'professional' makeup artist, i did some homework on it..
i found this wonderful tutorial on utube using turquoise eyeshadow..and i think, i will try that on her this friday.. we will see how it'll come out..*kalu jadi, i post, kalu x...hehe*

so heres the vid..very easy and simple ..loving it.

*p/s: sorry..this page is just to small to fit the width of the vid.hope u can still watch it.if not, just go to utube :).. tp rasenye nmpk je kot*

try it!

syazz! g study laaa~

2010-04-04T13:09:00.004+08:00

ye seperti tajuk entry kita pada hari ini..itu lah nasihat yg spatutnya didengari oleh tlinga ini..namun..kebosan dan kedegilan telah membuatkan sy untuk mngorak langkah setapak lagi kearah 'celik-IT'..mmg disedari sejak azali, diri ini sgt la buta-IT,,slepas beberapa tahun mggunakan laptop secara harian, diri ini telah dgn sedikit demi sedikit megorak kearah rabun-IT..jadi,untuk mnguatkan lagi diri dlm bidang IT ini, sy telah melakukan bebrapa perkara harini, yg bg sayalah, adalah satu pncapaian, namun org lain mgkin akan mengatakan "Ya ALLAH~ bapak ketinggalan minah ni. bru tauuu??"..haha..
jadi mari kita lihat ape kata surveyyyyy~~~~~~
harini, dah wat ape ek?

bgun pagi2 (pgi la sgt~~) siap2 g hospital serdang practise physical exam *konon* (ni cm xde kene ngene ngan IT la plak.xpe abaikan)
blaja cane nk donlod emoticon2 comel tuk blog ..hehe
donlod GreaseSpot, xtau tuk ape..men donlod je..tp tuk donlod emot2 comel ni kene ade greasespot ni.
pastu bukak userscript
haa dah bukak userscript tu..mcm2 la sy jmpe..skang dah boleh donlod video2 from utube!! :)

best x? best x?
ke ketingalan gile?..haha..xpe2, sy pasti mesti ade RAMAI lagi kat luar sana, yg xtau cane nk wat bende2 yg sy baru discover ni..kan?kan?

trima kasih la kepada ntah website mane ntah sy bukak tuk blaja cane nk donlod emot2 ni.. haa ni die..nk blaja? click syazcomel!
tgk la i pny blog pny print screen ni..

tp baru skit je emot sy donlod..tungguuuu..nk kasi penuh pasni! hehe

hurm..

pstu, tuk sape yg nk tau cane nk membolehkan korang donlod video from utube, kene g donlod si GreaseSpot tu dulu, pastu dtg sini blk and click syazbaik!

bende alah userscript sgt la best. habisla...xstudy la aku cani
eh xleh2!! kene g study!! bye...

episode 2: trima kasih saiyang

2010-04-04T12:30:00.002+08:00

kepada saiyang:
awak kate die xleh tukar2 kaler..
bolehhhh laaaa~~

tgk sy dah tukar dah..hehehe :p

tadaaaaa~~

trima kasih saiyang..muahhhxx

2010-04-03T22:44:00.006+08:00

haa ni dia namenye org penjeles..ye saya mmg penjeles kalu tgk org len best2..haa, kali ni jeles tgk desktop my saiyang yg ade calendar cum planner. jadi tanpa segan silu g tanya die mane die dpt mende alah tu, and ...

VOILA!

thanks saiyang..
len kali ajar saya wat mende2 cmni agy ye.
muahhhx
luv u mucho :x

p/s: kamal ruzaini, u jgn nk jeles2 i die 'my saiyang' ok!
i pukul u nnt.. :p

jom terbang..weee~

2010-04-02T13:18:00.009+08:00

ops sikap masih dijalan..
oleh itu,
apabila stress menjadi2 disebabkan final exam sudah dekat,terlalu dekat.
ditambah pulak dgn rase marah yg membuak kepada manusia yg mmg mintak penampar,
ditaburkan garam secukup rase dgn hati yg tgh kucar kacir,
disapu pulak dgn otak dah xbetul nk pk cane nk wat physical exam kalu cuak smpi gigil..
ditambahkan pedas, bila ade mnusia nk tipu2 pastu rahsia2 bende yg aku patut tau..
dienakkan lagi dgn janji yg aku xnk ngis dah pasal bende2 bodo.
haiiiii...
rase cm xckup tinggi je tingkat 3 umah aku ni..
mcam xckup tinggi nk kasi corak aku chantekkk skit kalu terbang dari sini.

hey kau.
ckup2 la tu wey.
aku boleh kasi kau rase sakit kalu aku nk.

**kpada sesiapa yg terbace post ni, jgn la korang pastu nk g tny2 aku "wey syaz ko pehal emo sgt?" "syaz knape blog u cmtu?" ...dan plg jgn ditanya "syaz..ni psal sape?" sbb mgkin nnt tak tertahan jiwa raga korang kalu aku jwb "pasal kau"...jadi baik jgn tny.**

air mata duyung

2010-03-27T03:29:00.003+08:00

"dah empat bulan oi..
empat bulan..
empat bulan aku xnangis..
patut la kali ni PMS cm ttuuuuttttt je..
rase xsedap hati je memanjang..
sayu xtentu psal je dua tiga hari ni.."

*bg aku EMPAT bulan tu kira lamaaaa ok~~ korang akan paham kenapa.sila bace selanjutnya tuk penerangan*

bagi sesetangah org..sesetengah je ye..
apabila seseorang menitiskan air mata, die dianggap lemah..
dia dianggap mengada2..dia dianggap manja..xtahan dugaan hidup.
lebih2 lagi kalu lelaki yg menangis.."faggot!!" "lembek!!" kan?kan?

faggot ke?

tp kan..dont u feel better after crying?..

mungkin org xtau agaknya..tp aku xsalahkan dorang..mgkin sifat kurang minat membace membuatkan level general knowledge dorang lebih rendah dari yg sepatutnya..
dorang xtau kot yg bila seseorang tu menangis, die akan turut serta (asal skema sgt ayat nih?!) mengurangkan stress hormone dorang terutamanya adrenocorticotropic hormone atau nama lain die ACTH atau name lagi glamour die ialah cortisol..

lagi satu, dorang jugak mungkin xtau yg ade lah org2 pelik yg suke wat research ni, dah wat kajian..and kajian dorang mengatakan bahawa on average men (manusia sejagat) cry once every month; women cry at least five times per month especially before and during the menstrual cycle when crying can increase up to 5 times the normal rate, often without obvious reasons..jadi kalian2, lelaki2 seantero malaya, silalah paham ye..
anyway, korang pon xyah la ego sgt, nk ngis, ngis je laaaa. xdenye kitorang nk ckp korang 'faggot' ke apekebende kalu korang nangis. i personally never had such toughts..tp kalu dah kene gigit semut pon nk ngis..over la tu brader..mmg aku pggil ko faggot la cmtu..

aku ni cetanya laen sket. nk nangis depan org, mmg xleh. xkuarla air mata tu jwapnye..die xmau kuar walaupon aku pkse die kuar. mase kecik2 tu len la..
cume beberapa umat shaja dlm dunia ni yg tau, yg aku ade ritual-amat-sgt-pelik aku sendiri.
ritual aku ni lah yg membuatkan korang nmpk aku ni dari luarannye cm manusia xde masalah hidup..apekah ritual tersebut? jeng jeng jeng...

haa..aku akan buat diri aku nangis setiap mggu. tp bukan ngis sbb sedih atau hormone buat hal tak memasal. tp ni lah cara aku mereleasekan stress..mmg pelik.
mesti korang tertanya2 cane lak aku leh "buat" diri aku nangis..kan?kan?
haaa kite kene ade setting yg baekkk pnya sayuu..xsusah tuk drama queen cm aku ni nk nangis..ade byk je script and ceta2 sayu yg aku bleh produce dlm kepala aku. byk jugak lagu2 yg aku leh dgr yg leh kasi mood sayuuu~~selalu aku pilih waktu sbelom tidur tuk menjalankan aktiviti ni..haa..tp kadang2 penat gile kan, xsempat.. letak je pale atas bantal,,,,zasssss!! ...zzzzzzzzzzzzz~
jadi, ape aku wat bile aku asek xsempat? aku cari la movie2 sedeyh mane2, kasi leh nagis gak,.,haha..kepelikan melanda kan?ye mmg pelik.aku tau.

tp xtau nape.. 4 bulan ni..(dah paham kan nape 4 bulan tu kire lame? 4bulan = 16 minggu fuh lame tu!)..xde mase nk ngis. lagipon aku nk tgk bape lame leh than xngis.leh je rupenye kan.tp tu la..effectnye sudah kelihatan..aku yg sbelom ni xpernah2 PMS, diserang PMS terlampau..bad mood, rase nk cubit org je keje, rase nk jerit, rase nk tampo org laju2, rase sume bende xkene, xsedap hati.dlm erti kate laen...tak happy. oleh itu, org2 sekeliling menjadi mangsa buruan aku.
hish..ni xleh jadi ni..

cane?aku knon nk wat rekod tgk bape lame aku leh tahan xngis.tp cm membahayakan je projek ni..nnt bertambah ramai mangsa yg akan terkorban..lebam2 anak org sume kang..
hurm..tgk la dulu cane..kalu mggu depan stil rase cm nk makan budak, aku hentikan proses 'no more tears' ni..hahahaha..

survival mechanism i called it

2010-03-21T16:32:00.002+08:00

" Honestly for me, i am at fault in regard to myself and my group mates. As said in the reflection, i have somehow lost the momentum i was having. In surgery posting, i was so enthusiastic! I would go back at 8pm or so, even if all of my friends has gone home. I would stay. I would sit by my patients’ bed, and have a chat with them, to know them better so i can do more reading and research on their problems. But somehow, along the way, i was the one who got hurt, when something happen to them. I fell apart. I was too attached. I would cry in the middle of the night, and sometime even in front of my patient and friends. After all of that, i told myself to be stronger, not to be too attached, or else I’m the one who’s going to suffer...... Thus, i became THIS. A person who only clerk the history as complete as i can for the moment, and the rest i prefer to ‘ask’ the computer. By that, i won’t see my patients suffer in front of my own two big eyes, and i won’t have to hold my tears and run to the sink to cry.

I am sorry for who i have become. I will try and change for the better."

this is what i wrote in my reflection diary for week 5.

im only half way in my third year..

and i have become the kind of doctor i have sworn not to be. heartless.

O Allah please help me through this.

i want to be the same person who wrote "and he say 'thank you'..."

the person who are so passionate and caring

help me get MYSELF back, i plead to you...

laaaa pulak!

2010-03-17T01:28:00.002+08:00

and again, untuk acapkalinya aku meng-diagnose diri sendiri

xckup ngan lipomanye..
skang ade bruxism la pulakkk..
seb baik mild je..
the known cause of bruxism is stress..

dah lame dah actually,
i keep grinding my own teeth, not the molars, but the incisorsss..
i told my friends of it, but none know what does it mean..
nk tny prof, asek lupe..
so last week, i went to see my dentist for my regular scaling,
tny ah kat die "dr, nape sy slalu wat cani??" (smbil tunjuk ar gaya aku slalu wat tu)
die kate "oh u are unconsciously grinding ur own teeth..stress la tu..meds student"
slambe je die jwb..apekah~
jadi aku yg lahir dgn sifat curious ni pon,mentaip la "unconsciously grinding teeth" kat google..
tup tup kuar.."bruxism"

pasni ape lak??haiyaaa...

the joker

2010-03-14T23:47:00.002+08:00

penjenayah aiskrem...

this is my joker

muahhhhhxxx!!!

al- inshirah ( 94 )

2010-03-10T20:54:00.004+08:00

In the name of Allah, the Gracious, the Merciful.

Have We not opened for thee thy bosom,
And removed from thee thy burden
Which had well nigh broken thy back,
And We exalted thy name?
Surely there is ease after hardship.
Aye, surely there is ease after hardship.
So when thou art free, strive hard,
And to thy Lord do thou attend whole-heartedly.

- Nabi Muhammad S.A.W bersabda: “Barangsiapa membaca surah Alam Nasyrah. seperti ia mendatangi aku dan aku mengambil kesempatan maka menjadi suatu kelapangan daripadaku.”

- Barangsiapa membiasakan membaca surah Alam Nasyrah selesai mengerjakan solat fardhu, nescaya Allah permudahkan urusannya serta memudahkan segala keperluan dan dimudahkan rezekinya.

- Sesiapa yang membacanya nescaya Allah turut melapangkan dadanya serta dijauhkan daripada segala kesukaran dalam segala urusannya. Dihilangkan segala sifat kesal dan jemu, serta mendatangkan rajin dalam mengerjakan ibadat.

- Barangsiapa membaca Alam Nasyrah 9x sesudah solat fardhu nescaya Allah akan menjauhkan daripada kesempitan hidup dan dimudahkan rezeki dalam segala urusan.

sy adalah tukang tilik nasib yg berkaliber

2010-03-09T22:01:00.003+08:00

see..i told u so..
sape yg xcaye i ckp aritu? haaaa..
dah jadi dah pon..
cepat gile kan?
kejap je kan?

tp xpe la..
i know its coming..
i was prepared for this..
this time around, im stronger
and i'll try to take it all down with a smile

ofcoz there will be a rainbow somewhere kn?

yes i have..

2010-03-08T20:14:00.003+08:00





Have you ever fed a lover with just your hands
Closed your eyes and trusted
Just trusted

Have you ever thrown a fistfull of glitter in the air
Have you ever looked fear in the face and said, "I just don't care"

It's only half past the point of no return
The tip of the iceberg
The sun before the burn
The thunder before the lightning
The breath before the phrase
Have you ever felt this way

Have you ever hated yourself for staring at the phone
Your whole life waiting on the ring to prove you're not alone
Have you ever been touched so gently you had to cry
Have you ever invited a stranger to come inside

It's only half past the point of oblivion
The hourglass on the table
The walk before the run
The breath before the kiss and the fear before the flames
Have you ever felt this way

to whom it may concern:

2010-03-08T15:32:00.005+08:00

lately there few things lingers in my mind, i wanted to say it outloud but somehow something got in the way..so here goes, to whom it may concern

to u:
if aku ckp or buat pape pon, ko xkn faham ape mksud sbenar aku..wekkk..
anyway,
aku xske bile ko asek ckp diri ko bodo. ur NOT!! pick up ur self esteem where u left it and work it from there..with that u'll be whoeva u want to be and achieve want eva u want to achieve.. i believe in you..i really do and u shud too. u are a good fren anyone would want (sometimes x, ok! buat sakit aty aku je keje) .. dont give a damn of wut others think of u..you are urself..as u said, u are unique kan.. (which i obviously dont think so.,haha)
frenship last foreva..but i hope our's last longer.. :)

to aok:
aok..u know what u shud do..jgn layan die smpi die dah jauh..if aok suke die, aok ckp..if xske, ckp xske..if aok takut, unsure ke ape ke, ckp gak..make her understand..
jgn sakitkan die k wok..jgn biar die layannnnn prasaan die sorang2, terperasan sorang2..wok tau kan ape jadi kat kite dulu..jgn bagi die rase ape yg kite rase dulu..ouch ok!..oleh itu, compose urself and sila trus terang..

to org yg rase die gemuk and nk BMI die 21 yg asek xmkn smpi dah lemah2:
i tau u xbace pon blog i, tp mane la tau,terlintas ke kan..
i happy tgk korang!!..go bro..jgn lambt sgt..nnt melepas..hehe

to che'yah:
u pon dah lame xbace blog i! haha..
this is my say to you --> you dont have to be in denial ..hehe..tu i je ok..u xyah..i hope u guys happy k..n sorryyyyyy sbb slalu ehem2 u..hehe..xterkawal diri ini ye..haha..tp jelingan tajam u sgt menakutkan..aaarrrrrrr!! and oh, i rindu u actuallyyyyy..pelik x?tp mmg rindu pon nk gosipp cerite panas yg kite due je tau..hehe..

to org yg tgh workout nak besarkan badan n pectoralis, tp xkn bg i tgk:
i hope u'll find ur peace, ur happiness and the love of ur life. im sure she want u to be happy..so dont sulk and buat muke masam hari2 k.. i really hope ape yg menjarakkn korang, will be solved. i really 1000X want u guys to be happy together. seriusly.. dah lame xtgk korang gelak same2 kuat2 nk mati smbil buat lawak guling2 korang tu.. :(

to her:
u can count on me darling tp i kadang2 takut nk tny kabar u, takut u kate i sebok2 je..dont be too hard on urself..take each step with deep breath and give the world a chance to see ur smile again..scars will heal but without proper medication and care it would not..

to sape yg nk g amazing race:
sila cpt2 buat video ye, n sruh rakan anda merayu dan melutut kat boss die supaya diberi pelepasan berjoli..haha..i xsabar nk tgk tv n ckp "go! go!! laju la sket..ish ape die wat ni!! eh ikot sbelah sana laaa~~ aiyak"..hehe

and lastly .. to myself:
amboi..pndai ckp org kan..ape nk ckp kat diri sndiri??
syazzz...sila2 la:
1. cari keje part time, ko tu dah pokai paham? xpon pk la nk wat bisness pape ke..huaaaaa!! nk duitttttt..
2. beli ketip kuku..ko nk percuss org ngan kuku pjg tu ke? yg berdarah nnt tgn ko sndiri gak kan..
3. jaga hati tu yee..kang ade yg sok sek sok sek lagi nnt..be aware and be prepare ok..
4. study weyhhh...dah 4th week, satu mende pon ko xbace lagi..apekejadahnye semua ini??!!
5. diet..ish malas nk tulis..tp ko tu gemok ok..smpi lemak tu konfius dah smbil berkata "eh populasi kite ni smakin bertambah ni, cane nk kurangkan space ni?mari kite jadi lipoma jom!!"

eh mgkin anda sndiri tidak sedar yg watak2 diatas adalah diri anda..haha xpe..asalkan ape yg terbuku dlm benak aku ni, aku dpt kuarkan..tp harap maaf jika entry ini mengecilkan isipadu hati sesiape..sesungguhnye tiada terlintas di hati ini nk compresskan kati sesape..harap2 xde la yg terkecill hati ye..semua ini ikhlas dari hati..hehe..

uuhhh that hurts

2010-03-05T01:18:00.001+08:00

ok mari tonton video clip ni..

huaa...sian gile..

jgn la anda2 mnjadi begini ..sgt kesian

kesian kan??huaaaa :'(

sent me back in time..dont!

2010-03-05T00:29:00.003+08:00

somehow,
i got a felling..that something not-so-good is goin to happen..that it may be back to the previous condition..oh lets hope not..please dont..please..
if it does happen, i would not know how to mend myself anymore..
in the mean time, im keeping my fingger crossed..n hoping for the best.. :)
ant let the rest be in the hand of the Almighty..

benjolan..lump

2010-02-21T01:44:00.004+08:00

perhatian!

a 23 year old lady noticed a lump on her left lower back since 1 week ago. she claimed that it is movable, about as big as a small marble. however there was no history of insect bite, no discharge, no sign of inflammation, not associated with pain, no fever, and the patient denied of having any other lump anywhere else.

on examination, it is noted that the lump was firm, movable, size of 2x3cm, smooth surface, well define borders. however, slip sign was negative, no discharge, no punctum, and it was non transluminant.

ddx?? - ok malas nk tulis

provisional dx??
LIPOMA

yes people, i have lipoma!

for those who dont know what lipoma is, google it..hehe

its basically FAT..yeah..ironic kan? me myself is one big lump of fat..how can that one fat cell dicided to mutiply dgn sesuke sukinye??kuang ajo namenye tu..

adoi..

but its ok..this one do not need surgery ..yet..waitla until its size jadi 5cm ke kan..

actually i was excited gile nk g under surgery..gile kan?

but mr.AAA said "if its troubling, we will remove it under LA, else enjoy having it"...haha

ok, i dicided to enjoy it first..hehe

nnt2 la kite g buang ek.. :)

this is us..

2010-02-08T23:28:00.003+08:00

~tHe gEdikickeRs~

5 years n counting... :)
heart'ing u to the core
~x.o.x.o~

p/s: prasan x, gmbr ni, susunan kite terbalik ngan susunan gmbr all black tu..hehe :)

accidental 'the gedikickeRs' reunited + few extras sidelines

2010-02-07T22:49:00.004+08:00

saturday oh saturday..
we went out..pastu call sai..tgk2 dorang jadi lak nk g wondermilk...kebetulan giles la wacakapsamalu..smbut beday naza n yana..pastu dorang meet us up kat johny's...

(matrik: all black.sume org nk kutuk time ni.pastu dorang sndiri pon nk pakai kaler same2.ceit.)

sai, syaz, azwa, naza : REUNITED + few sidelines (haha sorry guys, pggil korang sidelines)
ok la..tu tukar la..xmo pggil sidelines, u guy are better than that kan..ehem..tukar.."sidekicks!"..haaa ok la tu kan?canggeh..hehe

title edited: *accidental 'the gedikickeRs' reunited + few extra sidekicks!*

spell this out girls..

R.I.N.D.U.U.U.G.I.L.E.F.A.H.A.M.T.A.K!!!

then u know la wut happen kan bile pmpuan2 yg dah lame gilos xjmpe, tetibe jmpe..
"1..2..3..POSE!!...again2!!again2!!" hehe :p

we should do this again..soon!
and we should take more pictures..(picture yg akan diupload ofcoz..bukan tunggu sbulan ek mr.sidekick kamal :p)..haha..i dont have a camera..so, cant post any pic here..kene tunggu azwa n kamal uploadkan..

p/s: cpt la upload sayangss! :)

down under memory lane

2010-01-30T20:06:00.009+08:00

the moon is shining so bright tonite..
but it is covered by the cloudy nite sky..
i dont know why..
somehow, it brings back memories..

i miss the smile we had..
i miss the high pitch laugh we all had..
i miss the secrets we share..
i miss how we take care of each other..
i miss the day we played truth or dare!!..gosh..haha!
most importantly,
i miss us...

:)

memories are ment to be kept..
not in a folder..
but in ur heart..

cherish every moment u have
capture all the gliters
freeze all the glories..
so may it stick with u forever..

the letter..

2010-01-19T23:33:00.004+08:00

lately..
i talk to myself a lot..
i persuade myself frequently..
to see whats relevant..to look at things deeper..and to feel less
i weigh the pros and the cons constantly..
..and the decision made, became less excruciating..

to be mean and cold is so not me.
but i can ACT like one.atleast.
i am a drama queen remember?
its time to take care of myself. and think less about other's.

how did it end up like this? gosh..im so not in my skin rite now.
difficult.but my mind is set.its done.
im done.im washing my hands off.
no more.

sorry dear,but this is it.
its the ending u chose.
im merely granting u ur wish.
as always, ur wish is my command
abrakadabra! *pooofff!!* :)

best group

2010-01-15T20:28:00.003+08:00

NEVER a day i missed thanking Allah for putting me into such a wonderful group.

i LOVE u all so much.

never had such protective guys and such caring girls in my group before..
this is a group at its best..we are like a family..we do everything together..

but,
im so afraid to get too attached..
coz next year will be the end of it..
it will break my heart to be apart with them,
as we are sooo close now.
haih..

Allah,
can u please keep this group together till final year..please..pleaseeee pleaseeeeeee

zooe's criteria

2010-01-07T01:06:00.002+08:00

ok, setelah perbincangan yg rancak dijalankan antara ahli2 group 5 med0708 pada tarikh 050110, jam 1215, satu konklusi telah dicapai..inilah die zooe's criteria..

"ciri2 jantan berjaya"

baik, bijak , pandai, kacak, kaya, bergaya..

cube sebut laju2..it rhymes!!

lagi skali..

baik bijak pandai kacak kaya bergaya!!!!!!!

oh wujudkah???

*~~~~~melayang~~~~~~*

p/s: this criteria is a result of the research done by zooe.
(zooe; the founder of zooe's criteria )

yeay!

2010-01-04T00:03:00.004+08:00

hey noticed the new header??hehe..

seperti kelihatan ade tall 't wave' di situ kan?
adekah blogku ini menghidap hyperkalaemia, hyperacute MI ataukah left bundle branch block???

ok stop it syaz..mentang2 baru blajar bace ECG.. (maafkan daku bermonolog sebentar)

back to the point..ahem..ok.

yeay dah reti!..ok gile busuk, bnde simple cmtu pon nk 'yeay' kan?
tp..kira ok la tu tuk org yg techno blind..hahaha..
gune adobe plak tu..yeee~ tau~ hina gila~ bgga sbb reti dgn busuknya guna adobe~..haha..

anyway, reti la gak kan.. :p

"pulse...
.....aku dan degupan.."

ceeeeeewah!!..*kelip* kelip*..hehe

lub dub lub dub..

aku panggil ini simbol 'dewa'..this was my signature dolu2..all my stuffs mesti ade lambang
mende'alah ni..skang dah malas nk lukis..hehe

.......... is the name of the game

2010-01-01T23:39:00.007+08:00

am i selfish?
i think i am..
..i dont want to be anymore..

how long shud i hold on..?

no i shudnt do this..
i shud've let it go
i shud've let it choose its own path..
i have nothing to do with it. i cannot control everything..
its sumone else's future.. i shudnt hv fuck with it.

i have to walk away..for ur sake

the reality is..it SUCK!

2009-12-28T19:42:00.002+08:00

today is the day..though it has been expected. but it still hurt like shit...

..chapter 3..

2009-12-23T23:32:00.004+08:00

another chapter in my life has ended.closed.
the plot made me feel the palpitation that has long never been felt.
never thought that its gonna be THIS brief..

its ok.

will move on.
chapter 4 might be fun.. kan?

numb

2009-12-22T00:40:00.005+08:00

have you ever felt numbness? its there but it is not really there..u can touch it but u can barely feel it..n you want it to go away? yeah.

when u longed for sumting soooo much for sooo long..sooo much that u become numb.sooo long dat ur heart become numb. and in the end you couldnt feel anything anymore.

* **** *. but i couldnt feel anything anymore. make me feel happy again please.

havent met

2009-12-12T22:56:00.002+08:00

michael buble has never failed to melt my heart thru his 'oh-gila-cair' lyrics and 'oh-nk-mati-dgr' voice..over.n.over.again.
.and again.
yes, again.

everytime.
this time, its this song.. its lyrics is so cute and the rhytm is so catchy :)
loving evry bit of it.

I'm Not Surprised
Not Everything Lasts
I've Broken My Heart So Many Times,
I Stop Keeping Track.
Talk Myself In
I Talk Myself Out
I Get All Worked Up
And Then I Let Myself Down.

I Tried So Very Hard Not To Loose It
I Came Up With A Million Excuses
I Thought I Thought Of Every Possibility

And I Know Someday That It'll All Turn Out
You'll Make Me Work So We Can Work To Work It Out
And I Promise You Kid That I'll Give So Much More Than I Get
I Just Haven't Met You Yet

Mmmmm ....

I Might Have To Wait
I'll Never Give Up
I Guess It's Half Timing
And The Other Half's Luck
Wherever You Are
Whenever It's Right
You Come Out Of Nowhere And Into My Life

And I Know That We Can Be So Amazing
And Baby Your Love Is Gonna Change Me
And Now I Can See Every Possibility

Mmmmm ......

And Somehow I Know That It Will All Turn Out
And You'll Make Me Work So We Can Work To Work It Out
And I Promise You Kid I'll Give So Much More Than I Get
I Just Haven't Met You Yet

They Say All's Fair
And In Love And War
But I Won't Need To Fight It
We'll Get It Right
And We'll Be United

And I Know That We Can Be So Amazing
And Being In Your Life Is Gonna Change Me
And Now I Can See Every Single Possibility

Mmmm .....

And Someday I Know It'll All Turn Out
And I'll Work To Work It Out
Promise You Kid I'll Give More Than I Get
Than I Get Than I Get Than I Get

Oh You Know It'll All Turn Out
And You'll Make Me Work So We Can Work To Work It Out
And I Promise You Kid To Give So Much More Than I Get
Yeah I Just Haven't Met You Yet

I Just Haven't Met You Yet
Oh Promise You Kid
To Give So Much More Than I Get

I Said Love Love Love Love Love Love Love .....
I Just Haven't Met You Yet
Love Love Love .....
I Just Haven't Met You Yet

lelaki yg punyai kata2 mencairkan,
mr.buble :)

oh mari dowloadd!! (ok ptutnya beli..haha)

and he say 'thank you"

2009-11-27T22:33:00.007+08:00

having a chance to be a medical student, for me, is a bless..

i am reminded of the greatness of Allah the Almighty everyday, every moment..how wonderful the creation of His..and how He can take evrything that u own in a split second..all that u believed to be,might not be at all..u might be a brave, strong & tough soldier today, but who knows what will happen to u tomorrow? u can end up being a cripple who would be in the ward for 3 damn years, needing assisstance in doing E.V.E.R.Y S.I.N.G.L.E T.H.I.N.G you can do so effortlessly today.

now..im counting my blessing everyday..thank you Allah..

.......

that day..i went to a pt's bed just for fun..as i saw his finger pointing up..up..i don noe..somewhere..
i saw a few student nurse by his bed..so i asked them what is he pointing to..they shrugged.
not sattisfied with the given gesture, i ask the pt myself.."pakcik..pakcik tunjuk ape tu?"..i have to put my ear sooo close to his mouth as he could barely speaks..he whisper.. "siling"..i was so happy to hear a respond..then i ask again "ohh..ade ape kat siling tu pakcik?"..without looking at me he answered "bunga2"..

i was enlightened..

i have been in the ward for 3 weeks..but never once i reallise that the ceiling is decorated with small stamped flowers..that small flowers..created an impulse in that pakcik's brain..as that is the only thing he could do now..SEEING..he cannot move as freely anymore..he is as stiff as a wood..every single movement need a generous amout of effort.

i reallise how i took things for granted..how i go thru my days, just for the sake of living..days goes by pass me..time passes me so quickly..i should take time to look at things carefully so that i can SEE..not just looking, but seeing..

.....

from that day onward, i go to his bed everyday..talking to him..trying to make an active conversation..just so that he would not get too bored..it is a pleasure to hear his respond..eventho sumtimes i have to asked him to repeat his answer soooo many times, he did it willingly. never once he keep himself quiet when i asked him questions..

:
:

one day... when i was putting some gauze on his legs, to take off the pressure from the mould he has to wear to straighten his crooked legs..'"mencengkam" as he would say it..i look at him, patting his head, and....

i ask "ok x pakcik?"..........
"x ok" he whispered......
"x ok?kenape?mencengkam lagi kaki?".....
"selimut"..

i pull up the blanket up to his neck..and i giggle..he is so cute in that position!!haha atok yg comel..

"cmni pakcik??ok x??sejuk lagi??"
"ok..."
"dah ok??hehe...ok...skang pakcik tido ek pkcik..tido yee" putting my hand on his head

:
:
:

then..

for the first time,he look at me in the eye..
and whispered ever so softly..

"terima kasih......"

....

i froze.holding up my tears.

.....

that is the most beautiful 'thank you' i ever got..
so precious..
so sincere..
so pure..

:
:
:

thank you Allah..
thank you for letting me be in 'my shoe'...

aku sudah lupa

2009-11-22T01:26:00.005+08:00

aku kini sudah lupa.

pernah x alami situasi begini?...

pabila cikgu tnyakan soalan. yg kalian tau jawapannya..sgt tahu..pernah jwb soalan ini..erghh...siap ingt lagi dr muka surat mane dibaca makumat ini..tp..erghhh..ape ek?lupaa...xingt..sgt xtercapai dek akal..sgt tau tp sgt xtau..

.....

haih...
aku juga sudah lupa.

aku lupa bagaimana rasanya apabila sepasang mata memandang tepat pada anak mata aku, smbil mgatakan betapa aku amat disayangi..

aku juga lupa, bagaimana rasanya hati berbunga2 sepanjang hari..menunggu saat bersua..

sudah aku tidak ingt bagaimana rasa leburnya hati tatkala aku ketakutan, dikatakan pada aku supaya jgn dirisaukan kerana pasti akan selamat diri ini..

tidak ku ingt bagaimana ingin pecah jantungku bila aku rehatkan kepalaku ke bahu dan dirapatkan pipi ke ubunku..

bagaimana ya rasanya bila aku lihat dr jauh senyuman terukirkan untuk ku..hanya untuk aku.aku sudah lupa..

sudah aku tidak tahu langsung bagaimana bibir ini lenguh dek senyuman setiap kali aku terima mesej2 indah.. setiap masa, setiap hari, setiap minit, dari fon kecil yg kini sudah tidak lagi berbunyi..

btul aku sudah lupa..bagaimana darah mengalir sperti tsunami..bilamana kawan2ku menceritakan bagaimana diri ini dipertahan dari belakang..

ingin sekali ku ingt bagaimana rasanya aku mati seketika tatkala telinga ini dibisikan betapa aku diingini..

aku sudah lupa

the good old days..

2009-09-27T22:02:00.003+08:00

this is happiness...

when i recieve a call i did not expect in a thousand years, when i hear that voice, a weight is lifted off of my heart..=)..thank you for calling...and THANK you for saying sorry..

im sorry too for what wrong i did to you and for all those harsh words i wrote. and sorry for being so sibuk2 in ur life..

i hope this time around u'll make it right..
i hope this time around u will not break her heart as u did mine..=)
g kawin cepat2..aku nk jd mak angkat..eh leh ke mak angkat?

p/s: ignore list cane?

review on creed silver mountain EDT

2009-09-15T10:07:00.002+08:00

the best review for creed from a lelaki 'kacak' tp buncet sikettt,pakai tie zip..

"u ckp i boroi" "manede.. buncit lah" "boroi lah tu" after a few minutes "tgk, i dah xboroi dah" *sambil merah muka menahan nafas*

"i nk beli perfume yg mahal" katanya...

so kitorang pon search la psl perfume yg mahal sgt tu...

so jumpe satu perfume yg xberagak mahalnye..

CREED

Creed Silver Mountain Eau De Toilette Spray 120ml/4oz

A crisp & fruity fragrance for man
Adds a dash of tenderness to modern man
Combines with fresh, crisp & clear notes
Recommended for casual wear

price: RM803.00

this is what he said when he saw the advert:

A crisp & fruity fragrance for man

"eh fruittty..i nak! i nak beli!!!"

Adds a dash of tenderness to modern man

"i AM a modern man! =D"

Combines with fresh, crisp & clear notes

"eh crispy..I AM a crispy man (smbil kipas2 muke sndiri)..krakkk! krukkkk! krakk! krukkk!"

Recommended for casual wear

" i am a metropolitan man!"

xbergerak

2009-09-14T17:37:00.002+08:00

my life is static these days.
.motionless.

...................................................
...................................................

aiyo..bosan tau x

dari blog kak fynn (puisi tepi jalan)..

2009-09-12T17:50:00.003+08:00

kerana terhempapnya ayat2 dr entry kak fynn yg ini kalinya keatas kepala aku dgn deras..terasa bebannya..
kerana tertamparnya aku sampi ternampak merahnya di pipi..
dan kerana berderai air mata aku kedalam..
aku paste entry kak fynn ini.
untuk menyedarkan aku.untuk aku bukak mata.untuk kamu2 juga....

Thursday, September 10, 2009

perhatian penduduk negeri nafi

terimalah.

dia tak pernah nakkan kau.
dia sekarang dah ada org lain.
dia dah lama tak nak kau.
dia cuma nak main2.

tapi tidak.

kau tolak untuk percaya.
kau rasa kau lebih kenal dia.
kau tahu dia siapa.
kau benci orang semua.

berhentilah.

siapa yang kau bohong selain engkau sendiri.
dia tidak cari engkau
dia tidak peduli engkau
dia sudah lama pergi

cuma kau degil untuk memancang nisan.
sampai bila.

pecah suria pagi adalah selepas segelap2 malam.
maka harung sahaja runcing beku gelita.
mana ada kesepian yang tidak lama?
sesaat dalam siksa tak pernah setimpal dengan seribu hari bahagia.

kerana masa itu ilusi.
sepintas untuk yang menunggu.
seabad untuk yang tak mahu.

benar. hidup ini kejam. benar. tidak aku diadilkan. benar.
tapi yang ini benar juga:

betapa mudah kita membiar jiwa hancur.
sedangkan dari kecil ditatang mak ayah.
betapa mudah kita membiar diri ranap.
sedangkan dari kecil dijulang tak sudah.

betapa murah.

kalaulah tahu mak ayah.
kalaulah tahu betapa kita tak sudah2
membiar jiwa dan diri jadi murah dan mudah.

kalaulah.
pasti hancur dan ranap
seorang mak
seorang ayah.

entri ini adalah untuk mereka2 yang hidup dengan penafian.
ditulis dengan jujur, semoga didengarkan.

yang benar:

fynn jamal

bekas menteri besar,
negeri perempuan2 bodoh,
daerah denial,
zon sampah berkeruh.

drug

2009-08-25T20:36:00.000+08:00

i need another dose..

of you

2009-08-22T16:18:00.000+08:00

i miss you

badly

sadness

2009-08-21T00:46:00.004+08:00

remember muniama? my patient...the one who pronounce 'sepang' as 'essepai'..?
dat day she said her house number is "tiga puluh dua.tiga"..
i was very scepticle about the word "tiga puluh dua.tiga"..is it, 323? or 3023? or 3222?..
so...i asked omar to call muniama one more time to ask her the correct address..this time around she said "rumah nombo..aaaa...tiga puluh tiga"...i was like, okayyyyyyy...
then later dat evening me,omar,zubair n chia went out to find our patient's house..
to sepang we go..
fist destination...taman sri sepang...rumah muniama..."tiga puluh.tiga"..
to our suprise, theres no muniama living in the house number 33..ouhhhhh...nk kene ni..
i tried to call her again afta penat pusing2 in the taman..
THIS time she say "rumah...aaaa...itu...tiga puluh smbilan"...apekah?!!!!!!!!!huaa..

after some time,we found the house..alhamdullilah!!
i dgn jahatnye telah meng'set'kan otak yg die ni mesti cm patient yg menyusahkan,ade memory lost, kerek gile, and the lsit goes on...

but..

she has proved me wrong.TOTALLY wrong. terasa sgt bersalah.

she is very nice.

her mum is very bubbly and cute!!

they open up to us immediately..smpi tunjuk sume surat2 sokso, sijil kematian, ubat2..

her life is so.......kesian...sgt2 sedih..financial prob..i terpaksa tahan air mata dgn sgt dahsat..xleh nk ceta lebih2 kat sini..patient's confidentiality..but i really felt it..my heart crumpled badly..

her childrens is hopeless! listening to her talking about her children, we became very angry.. zubair smpi nk mintak number fon anak xgune die tu, nk call..(nk blasah kot.mentang2 terer boxing haha :p)..

we talk for almost an hour..her mum is so cute..she cannot stop talking.hehe..

anyway....

i was depress when we leave her house..

i will try my best to help her..

i promise i'll do sumting..atleast sumting small..sumting.

i'll go to her house again next week..

aunty..wait ek...nnt sy kasi bwk buah ok?kita mkn sama2 ek..:)

2009-08-19T22:01:00.005+08:00

this evening, we went to find our patient's house for the house visit..
one of the patient's house is near to sepang gold coast..
so...guess wat..

cont...

2009-08-19T13:43:00.005+08:00

how to adapt living in hell on earth?????
:
:
:

this is how its done..

:
:
:

candid by chia n farid: tiga2 TIDO mase lecture!!

dorang pon tido gak..haha

this is HEAVEN in hell :P

ni namenye dah xde keje

2009-08-18T12:10:00.000+08:00

2009-08-18T10:19:00.004+08:00

have you ever heard of hell on earth?
this is it
this IS hell.

esepai..aiiiiyoyooo..

2009-08-14T22:31:00.002+08:00

my first ever posting as a clinical medical student is, PUBLIC HEALTH!
aduiyaiiiiiiiii...first day msuk RC, at 8am, dgr lecture..pjggggggg..berjelaaaaa...lameeee...dr 8am tu smpi la kul 1pm..mane x kematu otak?..on the first day tu pon dah berjela list assigment yg prof dah kasi..nk tau?..haaaa meh bace..

1. buat proposal on health intervention program
2. bace atleast 10 published journal
3. wat literature review from the journals..lebih kurang 10..
4. wat questionnaire lebih kurang 130 cmtu..
5. wat report for every lecture on evry attachment

semua yg terlistkan kat atas ni...deadline = MONDAY (17/8) !!!!! tp deadline report lecture tu on wednesday.. gamak laa aku nk membuatnyee..

eh bukan tu je...pastu,ptg tu lak,(still first day agy nih),kul 230pm, we are at klinik kesihatan daerah sungai pelek..we were each given a case file of a patient (lebih kurang 2inchi la tebal bende alah tu)..we have to COPY EVERYTHING dlm file tu dlm mase xsmpi sejam!...eh xckup ngan tu je...we are then have to call the patient, to make sure that they are still living at the address stated on their file, and are alive..we have to tell them that we will be going to their house for a 'lawatan kesihatan'..not once...we have to go to their house atleast 4 times! and we have to make them say 'YES yu may'..if the fon number of the patient is not stated, u have to go and find the house in the address to make sure that are they still living there..if the address does not exist..you have to take another case file and COPY the whole damn thing ALL OVER AGAIN...adussss...naseb baik aku pny ade nombo tepon..

and so........i dial the number.........

..toot toot...toot toot..toot toot...

muniama: heeelloooooo... (gaya org bgun tido yg ade emas dlm mulut..si patient ni jwb)
me: aaa hello, bleh saya ckp dgn Muniama?
muniama:(dgn nada yg same sprti td,die jwb...) bolehhhhh
me: (oh ok die nk g pggil muniama la tu..aku ckp dlm hati)

....silence...

me: (eh pehal syp je die ni??)..oh ni muniama ke??
muniama: aaaaaaaaa (still nada yg sama)
me: (adui pehal die ni?tampa kang.pham ke x aku ckp ni?) ok pn.muniama, saya syazwani pelajar perubatan mewakili klinik kesihatan sungai pelek..sy nk pastikan samada alamat puan masih sama atau dah tukar...
muniama : aaaaaaaaaaaaa (zzzzzzz agaknye)
me: ok, puan masih tinggal di bla bla bla bla?
muniama: itu tadaaaaa (teka la sndiri nada die)
me: oh?puan dah pindah ye?..ape alamat baru puan ye?

muniama: aaaaaaaaaaa
me: (ya Allahhhhhhhhh..pehal die jwb 'aaaa' plak ni?die phm ke x ni??mati aku)..puan..rumah..rumah puan kat mane ye?
muniama: itu essepai..
me: essepaI??ECPI??
muniama: aaaaaaa laa..itu essepai..
me: (asal cm name air ECPI lak alamt die ni?die tggal kat bgunan ECPI ke?) ECPI??
muniama: aaaaaa laaaa itu essepan (mmg die sbut essepaN)
me: (hahaha!!!) oh..SEPANG??!
muniama: aaaaaaaaaaaaa
me: (haha gile bodo aku..essepai)..ok, ape alamat penuh puan?
muniama: aaaaaaaaaa
me: (mati aku!kene tn sebaris2 la niiii)...err..puan tinggal di taman ape ye?
muniama: aaaaaaaa itu serrri essepaN
me: (SERI SEPANG la tu..)..ok,jln nombo berape?
muniama: tujjhuu
me: (got it. TUJUH. yes aku terer)..err..rumah nombo berapa?
muniama: tiga puluh dua.tiga.
me: (watta?) tiga puluh dua.tiga.?
muniama: aaaaaaaaaa itu laaaa...tiga puluh dua.tiga.
me: (cis die ni..323 ke?)...323 ke?
muniama: haaaa..tiga puluh dua.tiga!
me: (nape la belit2 makcik oiiii) ok,saya ulang ye..alamat puan ialah 323,jln 7, bla bla bla...
muniama: aaaaaaaa (still xsegar2 agy suare die ni)
me: (bgun la mkcik oi)..ok,sy nk tny, boleh x, dlm minggu dpn, sy nk dtg rumah puan untuk membuat lawatan kesiahatan?
muniama: bullllehhhhh........
me: (yes! tp btul ke die pham ni?btul ke boleh ni?) boleh??
muniama: bullllehhhhh........
me: (die pahm kot.erk..harap2 la)..ok, nnt bile saya nk dtg nnt, sy call puan ye?
muniama: aaaaaaaaaaaaa
me: ok...terima kasih puan..
muniama: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

...toooooooooooooooooooooottt..

ini. mmg public hell.. -_-''

new day.new year

2009-08-10T09:29:00.003+08:00

its now the 3rd year of a life ive chosen

i am now here
lets do this..
.STRONGER.
.happier.

2009-07-08T20:47:00.004+08:00

to u:

i wrote sumting in the wild fire of anger
it was meant to hurt you, for you had done the same
i know im bad..but so are you
it was meant to make you understand. and i am SURE it did...
coz since then, u DIS-apear..whushhhh...
no more u..no more me..
..no more we..

huh wuteva! i dont mind losing a fren like u..
..im lying.. i do..
i do care. coz a fren is FOR-eva..
but.. heck with it.

i confess. i do think of u..a little bit..s.o.m.e.t.i.m.e. (s)

BUT ...
i am relieve to have let it out of my chest.
im not afraid anymore..
it no longer eating me away inside.
just so u know..
I HAVE NO REGRETS.. =)

no one starts a war ---or rather, no one in his sense
ought to do so---without first being clear in his mind
what he intends to achieve by that war and how he
intends to conduct it.
-CARL VON CLAUSEWITZ-

*this post has nothing to do with the previous post =)

mungkin

2009-07-08T20:34:00.003+08:00

u might have not known
u might have not realised
u might have forgotten

i might not tell
i might not show
but i never forgot

that u are still here
not there
.here.

birthday in advance! thx guys =)

2009-06-25T13:02:00.005+08:00

as u noe..or u might not know..or maybe u forgot..
my birthday is on 27/6..(ok,kang ade lak org ckp aku sje2 nk letak birth date aku nk promote..aish..maaf ye,saya bukn begitu)
but my sweet n lovely frens decided to celebrate it 4 days earlier..coz some of my frens will not be here when the day actualy comes..thx kencang,faiz,ain,anis,baem,zul,ali

we started the day with watching TRASFORMERS: revenge of the fallen...it was superb guys..awesome..but it was to fast to grab..i was confused as whom is talking to who is the one who is bombing the other autobots..haha..my bad i guess..otak lembab..kuang kuang kuanggggg...we are in luck because we did the booking 2 days prior..because the line at the counter was amazingly long, n it is full til midnite..good job syaz..the trick is, dont book on9 for 1st day show, book by phone! sure ade pny la tempat for u!! yeay..

then...we go to pizza hut..we ordered two sets of the set.(?? btul ke ayat ni??) anyway...when me,kencang n ain was ordering, the other 5 guys sudenly dissapear!..when they come back..suprise!! they bought me buskin robin's cake..yeay!!happy!!sedap!!!dah lame nk sgt cake tu...hehe thx guys..

after that,ain ask me to close my eyes..i refused at first..but then,after some argument, i agree..takut weyh..dorang ni bukan btul...kang xhape2 dorang wat..whoaa..takut..haha..then ain put something around my neck...i heard they laugh out hard..i feel it with my hand...raba2 sket...aaaaaaaa!!!!pajngnyenye tangan bende ni...dah agak dah!!!! a monkey teddy...kejam u guys..siap letak taik lalat..hahaha..one monkey pet is hard enough to handle, nw i got another one??hahaha

actually, one of them asked "nk makan kat mane??" ...i replied "delicious! tp msti xleh kan? =("
he said "tau xpe"....aaaaaa!!nk delicious! dah staun aku mintak tau nyet! nak nak nak!!

anyway....THANK YOU SO MUCH GUYS..i really appreciate it..happy!!!!yeay!!

close-up!! kejam x?haha..

at last..freedommmmm

2009-06-19T09:34:00.007+08:00

my goodness.
it all ended splendidly.
all passed!
note this.our overall performance is better than the seniors. the graph is going up!
dispite all the harsh words blundered by the lecturers all the way from our first year..

"ur batch is the worst!!teruk!!"
"ur batch is disappointing!!"
"contohi la seniors kamu.they are very matured.u guys are very disapoiting!!"
"if only 50% of ur batch passed pon, we will be very happy and glad!!" (serius rase nk ngis smpi guling2 mase dgr ni)
"ur batch performance is very bad.theres no such result in the history of this university"
"disapointing!!"
"disapointing!!"
"disapointing!!"
"disapointing!!"
"disapointing!!"
"disapointing!!"
"disapointing!!"
:
:
:
and the list goes on..

and to top it off, there was a revision class brought out only for certain people,which i xlayak masuk. many disagree with that. nonetheless,from dat day, i have made a promise to my self that i will prove to everyone that i can make it too..nah sila,sy pon dpt DISTINCTION gak ok!ha.ha.ha. (gelak kejam cm prof.hamdan mase kenekan org haha)..hehe
i made my parents proud. and that matters most.
[tolong jgn salah sgka dgn paragraph di atas ye..im not mad or angry or pape yg berkaitan dgnnya..saya cume mengekspresikan kesedihan.itu saja...maaf kalu ade sape2 yg terase ek..mintak maaf ]

nevertheless..despite of anything..i would like to express my gratitude to ALL of the lecturers for all the knowledge that ive gained.thank you!! i love you..i really do..

and to my friends who have been with me all the way, THANK YOU!!! we made it!!!!

see u guys in the hospital!!

we are one step closer..

aku brsalah atau sluar?

2009-05-31T18:00:00.001+08:00

hari 2 aku try pkai jeans yg br bli kt indon, mase kt sane sluar 2 still lg ble pkai, tp bile blk sni xmuat dh, adakah sluar 2 mgecil?

spagettonasi goreng tomyam? (thai+france+malaysia+minang)..waaahh makmur!

2009-05-29T21:14:00.005+08:00

dah lame xtulis resepi2 pelik yg aku masak kan?
yela..dah sume yg aku masak sume pon resepi pelik yg org xpenah dgr,yg aku sendiri pon xtau ape nk pggil...bile org tny "syaz u masak ape?"....aku akan jwb.."huh??errr...ayam err..ntah..i pon xtau ape ni!haha i men masuk je.."

ok now, lets get back to the point..
tonite..i mean just now..i was really hungry..so i scrape off the kitchen to find anything that can be eaten..well theres many..but..hurm..nothing..

keep looking..

ahhaa!! theres rice!..hahaha..

but,,,,alahaiiii secipottttt je weyh.."well nasi kan leh kembang,nnt byk la"..and so i tot..

TING! the rice cooker popped.."yeay!!" i walked to it..."aduhaiiiiii,dah la sket,lekat2 kat tepi lak ko ye nasi?"...i scrape it off..."sesuap je dpt ni...hua.."...hurm xpe la..."curik spagetti kim la!yeay!hahaha"

so now, lets start cooking!

first, heat the pan with some cooking oil..
eh jap..tukar bahase la....ckp omputeh xbest la..
ehem2..
ok..eh silap!..baiklah..
bile minyak dah panas, msukkn bwang merah besar yg telah dipotong smpi berdesir2...shhhshhhh shhh..merecik2..smpi wangi ok?
pastu sila la masukn bwang puteh yg telah dicincang dgn gaya seorang chef..cincang laju2 tau..kalu xlaju nnt xjadi resepi ni..haha
bile dah gile babs pny wangi smpi perot tu bertambah kuat bergendang, masukkn daging ayam yg didadu, hirisan sebijik hotdog, daduan sehelai nugget,dan tidak lupe potongan menggoda chicken fingers atau name laennya jemari ayam..
berdesirrrrrrrrrr..shhhhhhssshhhshhshhhh!!
goreng la smpi masak ye ayam2 dan bahan2 itu ye cik..
errrkk,,lapar okkkk..
ok kalu dah lapar sgt, masukkan la paste tomyam kedalam bahan gorengan anda tadi..
gaul smpi jadi cantik dan berseri2..lebih kurang 3-4 min cmtu kire cantik la tu..
pastu.......
grrgrrr..bunyik lagi perut ni,..cepat la msak
masukkan nasi yg telah dimasak, n spagetti yg dicuri drpd cabinet kim (thx kim!eh aym tu td pon kim pny..eh hotdog pon!haha)..sile jgn lupe rebus dulu spagetti itu ye..kang xpasal2 je..
gaull
gaul lagi
ok lagi
ok lapar sgt ni..cukup..
cari mgkuk yg gmbr bunge2,masukkn masakn anda td..
eh jap!!jgn lupe letak garam sket..n lada hitam..
cis lapa smpi lupe..
dah masukkan dlm mangkuk bunga tu?
ok dah siap!!
tngkap gmbr..hehe
aaaaaa nyummm..

masih hidup

2009-05-25T00:36:00.005+08:00

yup im still alive alrite..
it has bee awhile hasnt it?
not dat i dont want to write.
not dat i dont have anything in my mind dat i want to spill out
they are screaming inside me u know..
i simply dont have the time..
seriuosly..
pro exam is JUSTTTTT around the corner..
a few days ahead..
can u imagine wut kind of emotions im having..
all jumbled up..up to the point of..hurmm..i dont even have the word for it..

mbe i have to wait..
wait a little longer..
after pro ended,im sure theres hell lot i can write n chatter about..hehe

life is so boring rite now..
its all about discussion n reading n printing notes
the more i read..the more i dont know..
cane nk jadi doktor ni?
dui..penin...euewwuuuueeeuuueewww...

here some sweet memory dat is keeping me alive..
alive..d'oh..xde la mati kan..i mean..when ever i see dis pic, i can always smile no matter what is playing inside my head..

all black..beday afiq..

tangkap serangge kat cyber park..uhhuuu rindu..tsk..

missing the moment..

see how rakus we were?how happy we were..haha..those were the days..
rindu gile kot..ni raya plg hancus..plg rakus..

ni..xpaham..haha

aaa ade bykkk lagi gmbr nk letak..papparazzi byk sgt..nnt kontroversi lak kan..haha

ok mbe after pro..i'll be myself again..hehe..yeah..sure..yup sure!

peninju merah jambu

2009-05-16T19:58:00.003+08:00

penah dgr x seni kata lagu.. "milik siapakah hati ini..."

ok..cube nyanyi seni kate ni..gunakan nada tuk lagu td tu.. "milik siapakah boxer ini.."

begini kisahnya..

satu hari sabtu yg panas..waktunya tgh hari..noon bak kate omputeh..sekumpulan kanak2 yg kelaparan telah berlumba2 pergi makan ke kedai kegemaran di cyberjaya iaitu kedai mak teh..hampir semua kanak2 itu belum mandi..tp kerana laparnya perut, mereka semua basuh muke, tukar baju, sembur perfume, naik keta dan terus pandu..

seperti biase..bila dah sampai ke kedai yg selalunye full house itu, pengunjung akan pergi ke kaunter nasi smbil berkata "cik nasi!"..sesudah makan..kanak2 yg sekumpulan itu td berbual bual dgn gembiranya..sesudah penat bergelak ketawa..dan sedar akan keadaan diri yg belum mandi itu..seorang kanak2 riang yg sudah kekeyangan ingin membayar makanan yg telah dilahap itu td..oleh yg demikian, kanak2 ini dgn bangganya telah bangun dan bergerak ke kaunter..counter top tu cm agak paras pinggang bg kanak2 yg beriya2 ingin membayar itu..dengan itu..beliau pon merehatkan siku di atas kauter pembayaran itu smbil menonggekkan punggungnya yg sesungguhnya........errr.....how should i put it...errrr....xpe,anda pk la sendiri..
sambil die tonggeng2 punngung itu,,,,,die tidak sedar akan keadaan t-shirtnya yg pendek dan terangkat itu telah menyerlahkan satu sinaran berwarna merah jambu yg amat menyilaukan mata..tanpa membuang mase salah seorang dr kanak2 yg sekumpulan itu td yg otaknya mmg laju bila nk mengenakan org, telah mgeluarkan iphonenya dan ape lagi "SNAP!CLICK!"........"hahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahaha!!" kedengaran tawa besar yg menggegarkan makteh itu...org2 yg tidak dikenali dr meja2 laen juga memandang dan turut serta dlm proses penggelakkan itu...

kanak2 yg menonggeng itu td merasa gegaran akibat tawa besar itu td..die pon menoleh ke belakang...jeng jeng jeng...sume org dlm kedai tu tgh pandang die smbil ketawa dan senyum kambing...serta merta mukanya menjadi merah...tangannye meraba ke bajunya di bahgian belakang dan...suppppp!..menurunkan bajunya yg terangkat td..

aku pon memandang padanya dgn mata sayu berkata..

.
.
.

"mr.K....seksi laaaaaa....."*winkwink*

..hehehe..

pleading self

2009-05-12T02:44:00.006+08:00

"syaz..plz stop this childish act of yours..u r much better than this..u know u do..dont do this to ur self plz..u noe how it'll end.don let ur self drown again.stop it.stop it."i begged to myself

what a roller coaster ride a had tonite..
start with end in mind..
as ibu always say "the ending that is important"
i doesnt care how my day started..
as long as i get into bed smiling..its fine..
well..tonite, i end my day with a smile..a big one..heeee~ =)..hehe..im honestly happy..
music always have it way to make my frown melt..

"You seem to know the way
to turn my frown upside down
you always know what to say
to make me feel like everything’s ok"

-lenka-

RE: nymph

2009-05-11T23:36:00.003+08:00

frustratedly i wrote the entry 'nymph'..to sha..so die si kaki donlod tu, will donlod statrek for me..
BUT this is what she write back in her blog..

RE: nymph

Kawan, star trek movie nih nye original dvdrip lom kuar lg...
u nk CAM nye, yg record dlm wayang nye ade la...
sakit mata tgk...sakit tinge dgr...mau?

Dh dload nnt...i bg eh...dgn caj spesel utk u....
saye caj awk....blanje sy mkn sushi king....okie?

this is my reply ...

RE RE: nymph

sume org kejam kat i.

im frustrated.
nyampah.
=(..

seriusly dis is my actual reaction..HUAAAAAAA!

hehehehe..

nymph

2009-05-11T23:09:00.002+08:00

sha..tolong donlodkan star trek tuk i plz..

do u cook?

2009-05-08T21:13:00.008+08:00

lauk tu sedap..sayang nk buang..
tapi..

dah tawar la rasa dia..
cane ek?nape ek?
garam xcukup la tu kot..
xpun,sbb dah lame sgt simpan dlm fridge tu..

dah pudar la warna dia..
adui..
mungkin sebab terlebih letak air kot..
xpun..sbb api tu besar sangat..panas sgt
tu la warna dia bertukar

nak g beli garam sikit la..
perlu ke?

nak tambah kunyit..pekatkan balik
perlu ke?

tak perlu la pakai garam..cuba gula..mungkin lebih sedap
kunyit?tukar warna baru nk?hijau?letak cili..mungkin lagi cantik

tapi..
tapi ape lagi..

lauk tu sedap..
syg nk buang..

laa..td kata dah tawar..dah len warnanya
masak je la yg baru..
rase die mmg la xsama
tp mane tau lagi sedap ke?

xleh..
nape lak..

tong gas xde..
aaa

ayam

2009-05-08T20:43:00.004+08:00

have u ever been called a chicken before?
"alaa...ur a chicken!chicken!chicken!"
people always refer cowards as chicken..but why?

today..
i have realised why..
i attended the shortsem repro class..
today is physio of reproductive system with....
dr.hafiz ngoo..

"sperm production is influence by temperature jugak tau..dat is why ur testis is outside ur body"
"hehehehe" the guys laughed
"but not all have their testis outside of their body..like ayam..ayam punya testis kat dalam"
"hahaha..chickens have no balls..haha.." the girls whisper

me concluded "oh!patut la org pggil org penakut chicken!bcoz they have no balls.."

tp ade org ckp "bukan la..sbb ayam bile die nmpk bende je die lari.."

i countered "xla! btul la tu..sbb chickens have no balls"

org td ckp blk "xla..abes tu..ikan pon xde testis kat luar kan?nape org xpggil org penakut, "HEY FISH!""

me "tp" "......" "ngok la die ni" "hahaha"

ok..which one is the correct theory?

=)

2009-05-05T19:40:00.001+08:00

the study group is on tonite.yeay.

aaaa..kecamuk

2009-05-05T12:14:00.002+08:00

should i study or should i not?
haih..is that even a question?..ofcoz i have to..i dont want to..but i HAVE to!its pro exam in..what..39 days?aarghh..but here i am..in the pbl room, tapping on these little black tiles with white letters printed on each, looking out through the glass wondering if my study group frens is coming or not..

i am very sure i cannot study alone..how can i?byak gile kot nk bace..9 systems..2 years..in 39 days?it like SPM all over again but its definitely HARDER! waahh if only i have the brain which its sel-sel otak bergabung dengan rakus sampai terbabas2..mine is..hurm..figure it out yourself..

tot of having a study group..i really hope that i would work out..honestly,sgt jeles ok dgn study group jude,azrina,naji, ainun n some others which tirelessly come to this campus evryday..studying together everyday..enriching their knowledge with every single discussion they have.for sure they have studied a lot..kan?..me?duh..nk ngis ar pk..takut weyh..aku bodo tp respi pon xabes study agy..im moving veryyyyyyyyyyyy slow here..what should i do?..im frustrated with myself.

now, im cracking my head out figuring a way for me to study..i cannot study alone..im not as smart as some of my friends who doesnt have to work their ass off to score..for me passing is a pleasure..

what should i do?

.
.
.

im still looking through that glass...
.
.
.
nobody..

i guess i have to study alone today..
haih..
g study syaz!!shooh!shooh!!

setan xguna!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-05-01T19:40:00.003+08:00

ni la rupe setan xgune tu!!

setan xguna PENIPU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!ko mmg nk mati kan??!
"nk mandi pulok"..what the funcking hell??? pdahal ko tgh wat bende bongok kat sebelah ni!! ko tipu abg ko...KANTOI!!!selama ni ko tipu aku jugak!!!!!tahikkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk ko!!!!!setannnnnnn aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!

selama ni ko ckp "dah2 aku nk stdy!jgn kaco!" @ "jap..aku ade keje ni"..ko tipu!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!xberguna ko wahai manusia tahi durjana!

padan muke ko kene baling ngan sume bende yg ade depan mata aku!nasib baik xde pisau!!

best gile kalu ade depan mata aku..mmg aku tikam ko si penipu!

ko tahiiiiiiikkk!!huaaa..ko mmg manusia xguna..

ni ko..bukan yg berdiri tu..

ko gelak2 ye tgk aku tulis bende ni...ko tunggu..ko doa je la yg aku xnmpk bende2 tajam kat depan mata aku..

penipu!!!!!

di bawah pohon asmara..

2009-04-20T00:16:00.005+08:00

selamat pengantin baru azni & fiza

yesterday biha called and say dat her uncle,who is a wedding planner need 4 girls to be the usher for a wedding at the 'very the mahal' and 'very the grand' hotel, palace of the golden horses, (ecah, kwn2 u ramai kat situ) on sunday. ee..tau x mahal gile babun nk kawin kat situ?! tau x aku jeles?!! aaa!..anyway,the catch is, we will be paid rm60 each.cool. mmg aku sgt laaa nk duit skang ni..SENGKEK!

so.setibanya kitorang kat ctu, kitorang disuruh tuk memulakan keje.letak bunga telur kat setiap meja for 50 tables of 10.mudah.kacang.wat keje tu bape minit la sgt pon...pastu,dah abes je kitorang di beri makan.laaa...baru je smpi,baru wat satu keje kecik.xpe la..bedallll..aku pon dr smalam cume makn 1/2 paket megi. pny laaaa xde duitnye kan..pas makan,susun lagi skit bunga telur yg tadinya xcukup.amek mase 2 min je pon.pastu dah. then kitorang disuruh g tukar baju. mekupnye lebih lame dari keje td tu..dekat sejam stgh kot dak2 ni mekap.oh ya!!btw, macam2 la bende jd kat wafaa...sian die..serius lawak..what can be worse kan.its just ur luck la darling..hahahah! (wafaa don wory k,i xceta...hehehehe)..sesudahnya kitorang tukar baju tu, sedara mara sahabat handai rakan taulan si pengantin yg gila babs pny kaya (millionaire!) pon mula la sampai. tugas kitorang? bg wish card kat sape yg dtg. sruh dorang tulis wish tuk pngantin sbb nnt kitorang nk gntung wish list dorang kat pokok tu.ade la pokok tu..pastu, aku ngn biha tunjuk kat org mane meja2 dorang.sejam je kot sume tu.

oh lupe!!ade lelaki kacak!sgt ok..."senyum syaz!" aku ckp dlm hati bile mamat tu lalu haha.die lalu bykkk kali. cube bygkan bape kali aku ulang ayat tu dlm hati..haha.biha pn ckp "ish hensem..." ...ok,dgr ni..lelaki kacak itu adalah anak millionaire merangkap ADIK kepada si pengantin lelaki tuuuuu!faham x?..huaaa..nape dunia ni tidak adil?nape die pandai, kaya, bwk merce pada usia 20 tahun, hensem gila kacak, anak millionaire dan kemungkinan besar pndai (aku xpasti.tp english die bersepuh)??aku pon nk cmtu gak leh x?cuma tukar "hensem gila kacak" kepada "cantik gila menawan" haha..

wish list card

ini la pengantinnya..

waaahh..pelamin yg huaa

bila pengantin dah masuk.sume org duduk.mkan.kitorang pon bedal lagi...

hurm...ulang blk ape je keje yg kitorang wat? susun bunga telur,bg wish card, tunjuk mane meja,makan,makan agy. pastu dpt RM60. faham x?logik x?..huaaaa sewonokkk! dah la sepanjang mase kitorang kat situ,asek men tgkp gmbr.siap ade tgkap gmbr curik2 agy *wink wink* hehe..

di bwah pohon asmara..

adik pngantin! pndai x kitorang curik tgkp?

sedang gantung wish list card..semoga ape yg sume org wishkan tu jadi kenyataan..

nak tgk ape wish yg aku wat kat wish card tuu ????hehehehe

jeng

jeng

jeng

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''i wish i will marry your brother''
hahahaha!! mission imposible..
tempted gile nk gantung ni kat pokok wish list tu..serius.haha
baik aku gantung diri dr aku gntung wish ni kat pokok tu..

selamat pengantin baru..semoga kekal abadi..bahgia ke anak cucu..semoga murah rezeki..AMINNN

aku tak tahu

2009-04-15T17:53:00.006+08:00

hari ini 15 april 2009.bukan aku mahu beremosi.tidak juga aku mahu membebel membabi buta.ini adalah apa yang aku rasakan disaat aku membaca komentar yg diberi padaku berkenaan penulisanku yg sebelum ini.telah aku padamkan komentar itu.aku benci sekali.mungkin gurauan juga ada batasnya.ini rasa hati aku.............

nak ejek?ejek laaaaa..silakan.ejek la..caci la..kutuk la aku sepuasnya yg kau mau..biar puas benak perut kalian..biar penuh hati kalian dgn tawa..itu yg kalian suka kan?gelaklah..tertawalah sepuasnya.persendakan aku.persendakan lagi.

apalah gunanya sahabat jika hanya tahu dan mengerti erti menjatuhkan.perlukah kalian mempersendakan setiap gerak geri langkah aku yg sememangnya kusut ini?bukan sokongan,tetapi tawaan sinis yg kalian lontarkan pada aku.aku yg sesungguhnya hanya picisan pada mata kalian.jijik.

kalian sememangnya mengerti dan sesungguhnya kalian amat tahu dimana ralatnya perlakuan itu.mungkin jika hati kalian boleh melihat,tidak sekabur pandangan mata kalian itu,kalian akan dapat lihat setiap garis parut yg kalian toreh pada benak aku.

sememangnya aku turut tertawa dimana saat kalian perbodohkan aku.tapi apa mampu daya aku.perlukah aku memalingkan wajah?haruskah aku merajuk?tiada manfaatnya semua itu.kerana kalian adalah kalian.dan aku, sekali lagi,hanya jijik dimata kalian.

copy paste from NANARANI..but sgt3 true..

2009-04-13T18:24:00.003+08:00

i have to read this thing EVERYDAY starting from now!
i have heard of this book a few years back.oh yeah,i watched oprah! oprah's book club!
and theres this book.."he's just not THAT into you"..i love the book..i read the book..tp xbeli.hehe..i went to kinokinuya everyday while waiting for my dad,sitting on the floor,pick that pink covered book and my eyes and mind are just digging into it..i know that the movie version is coming out..but xtau lak mmg dah kuar dah!!gosh!! i have to watch it.period. i realised dat the movies has been shown when i come across nana rani's blog..and what she wrote is very true.

**courtesy of nana**:

It is indeed true that you are entitled to find the love of your life, but would you forever want to life in question marks? The beginning of the movie was true enough, we are conditioned to think that if someone treats us like s***t, means he or she likes you. FORGET IT! If someone treats you like that, it means that person means it, nothing else.

STOP thinking that someone likes you when he or she treats you like crap, calls you names or teases you till your heart aches. They're doing that because they mean it, nothing more, nothing less.
STOP questioning yourself about the signs and symptoms that may be due to his or her feeling towards you. It is just your imagination, nothing more than just a hallucination you create so you will not feel so bad about yourself.
If someone likes you, he or she would just go for it, so STOP imagining someone will come and be on their knees, begging you to come back. That is just plain fairy tale.
STOP thinking that someone will change for you. It will never happen, not in a million years as everyone thinks about their selves first, including you!
If someone doesn't call you, don't act like a desperado and try to call that person back. STOP hoping and dreaming and assuming that the person is on the other line waiting for your call. It just doesn't happen that way.
STOP waiting for someone that will never turn back to look for you, just MOVE ON!

ok..nana, u got me straight on..ouch ok..
i'll read this every single day..thx for writing this and sekaligus reminding me not to live in my own creation of cloud nine..

freedom?

2009-04-13T17:18:00.005+08:00

having an international passport gives u freedom?
whenever u feel like running away from home after got scolded by your mum or dad,u can use ur international passport and elope! haha..NAAAHH..

i still remember when i was a kid (still am kot), whenever ibu whipped my ass with a hanger, pull my ear infront of all my frens and drag me home just by holding the ear that shes pulling, hit my head on the bathroom wall, or making sambal cili using my mouth as the grinder, i always..always have this image of nobita (kwn doraemon tu,in case u dont know haha) putting all his clothes in a cloth, wrapping it up, and putting a stick across it..haha..get it?..lari rumah!..yeah rite..nk lari kemane wahai si kecik yg pendeks yg selalu sesat jalan? paling2 pon nk lari g umah makcik aku yg xsmpi 50meter dr umah tu..haha

ok back to the point..today i got my international passport..yes..im late..ye..tau..org len sume dah ade dah mende alah tu..but anyway, now i have one. since i cannot make my passport at the putrajaya immegresen HQ , i have to go back to wangsa maju kl..im no good with roads..im a failure when it come to directions..i got lost..big time.seriusly..so this time around, i ask a dearest fren of mine to come along..i ask wheter he can make it on wednesday,unfortunately, he cannot..a bit frustrated but xpelaa..nak wat cane kannn...hmm..pk pny pk..decided to go today.no point waiting until wednesday..pk lagi..nak pergi sendiri nnt sesat ntah kemana pergi..nk call ayah sruh jemput?mesti sure2 die dtg pny la..tp..sian die..xnk susahkan ayah..ayah keje bwak teksi..susah..penat..kalu asek nk ulang alik amek anta aku kat cyber ni,dah bape jam die rugi..kalu income sket,duit xckup,nnt mesti gaduh besar ngan ibu..xnk..xnk..xnk sgt..xnk dorang gaduh sbb aku..xnk..aku sanggup fail exam dr tgk dorang gaduh..seriously.
then, i decided to go alone..air mata nk kuar dah sbb terbayang nnt sesat ntah g mane..drive my car to petronas (lngkah berjaga2.kang sesat atleast ade minyak) and off i go. its not a problem to reach kl, but when its time to find 'wangsa maju', palpitation follows..anyhow,the journey must go on..

with few wrong turnings..
few drops of tears (ngis sbb mara sbb aku bodo sgt asek sesat)
few phone calls
and a thousand loud palpitations
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i reach the immegresen wangsa maju!yeay to me!
lap2 sket air mata..kuar keta..masuk immegeresen..amek number..g kaunter..tunggu sejam..eh xsampai sejam sbb pakai kabel,25min je..
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KRING!!KRINGGG!!tepon bunyik..
hello?cik syazwani?passport cik dah siap ye,sile ke kaunter 15..

siap!

leh g jenjalan!!yeay..

indeed it was FUN!

2009-04-12T19:51:00.009+08:00

oh terendak dgn encik.soldier yg HOT..

i never thought that it would be that much fun.seriously it was..except for PT (physical training)..ye ar..PT tu over ar.."ko nmpk tiang gol kat sane tu??!aku nk ko masuk kanan keluar kiri smpi sini blk dalm kiraan 10..sato!doa!......" pale otak die..ingt dekat ke tiang gol tu?aku ni dah cm bola yg nk masuk gol dah..pastu siap sruh guling2 atas tanah basah tu.."ko nmpk hujung tu?guling ke kanan!!"..wachaaaa.."ko penat siswa siswi?!ko xlarat siswa siswi?!ko meniarap!push up!10!!"..abes je 10 tu..xsmpi sesaat.."baring!!sit up!!"..mase baring tu..aku nmpk kaki ngan perut aku dah hitammmmmm..pastu bnde itam tu leh gerak2..mende ni??huaaaaaa semuttt wooo..aku dah guling2 n wat push up atas itu sarang semut woo..kegatalan aku kene gigit...heyhhhh ko tunggu la jannah..kalu nnt aku jadi doktor askar(kalau la kan),aku jadi kapten seyh..siap la ko!siaaap la ko..

anyway,there was bundles of new things that ive learnt from them.

i now know that, it is safer to go to sleep with ur wet shoes on..smpi kedut2 jari kaki..badan je dalm khemah,kaki kat luar..so dat u'll will not have to do the lompat bintang coz u r late..
do not speak in the toilet.coz then,the soldier cannot get their sleep, and u all will be thrown into a river full of lintah..
i now know that we can do an intriuqate kicking dance move eventhough theres no music around n bill is not recording, push everyone's head under the full-of-lintah-mud just to get ourself safe, get blown in the face and killed by the train crash, talk nonsense, do nothing in significant and still get the "anugerah pelatih".
it is now confirmed that u'll will not be disturb by ghost if u recite the quran in the jungle. and the bonus is, acid lactic will not get accumulated in ur stomach!
u will loose a lot of weight, get to do the lompat bintang countless of times, running back and forth trying to immitate the marching skill of the soldier and get to be called sotong if u are a good penghulu who have done everything in ur power to do ur job.
dont get lost in the jungle and trust the compEss.if not, u'll get a sauna in the penjara lintah.
even spf 130 sunblock doesnt work in terendak.
its good to drink a drop of water from a bottle cap which everyone's finger has been dipped into...including alex's finger.aakkk
we can actually take a bath with 4-5 girls in one tiny bathroom and get ready in 5 min.(kalu kat kl,sejam xtentu agy)
human can put a hold on his desire to go berak'ing for longg 6 days.
take a bath only twice in 6 days.eventhough u have gone walking through the jungle for 4 hours peluh2, guling2 on the muddy field, got onto the penjara lintah, bitten by thousands of mosquitoes and serangga berbisa, wet-dry due to the rainy season, splashed by chicken's blood and covered with smoke
scolded when u did not ask the password, but get laughed at when u ask. pelik dowh askar hot tu.
eat as fast as u can.dont mind ur stomach plz.u have to rush to clean ur tray.
dont rely on ur eyes only.seeing is not believing.im small but im VERY heavy.im FAT la weyh..49kg is very heavy! even heavier than 55kg!..using a strecher doesnt make it any lighter..xcaye? try and ask, fern,faran,sarah,bhavani,maryam,ali,ammar,kujie,anis, zubair, usop,adress and a few other that i cant recall. (mbe org2 kuat tu dah penat angkat ramai org sbelom tu,aku last kan..or..mbe sbb aku berat dosa!hehe)
soldier is a living bipolar.kejap wat lawak.kejap nk lempang org.kejap senyum.kejap nk maki.kejap ketawa.kejap pandang ngn muke mara smbil wat tgan cm nk terbang smbil sebut "haaa turun2!!10!"
ok actually theres MORE but dah penat nk listkan sume..

when i was there in the jungle camp,,im counting time by the minute.."bile la nk balik..bile laaaa nk balik"...but when i step my foot on the bus..."huaaa xnk blk"....
(its ok,i'll do my posting there next year!)

when we reach kl,everyone is talking about how great it was there..a place called terendak..

jgn endahkan bag2 itu.sila lihat wjahku yg hitam.

my group..BRAVO team!

terendak was FUN..